Low Self-Esteem Will Rob You Of These 11 Things

Low self-esteem robs you of the ability to feel good about yourself and be happy. However, it also takes away small everyday things from you that you may not be fully aware of.
Low Self-Esteem Will Rob You Of These 11 Things
Valeria Sabater

Written and verified by the psychologist Valeria Sabater.

Last update: 15 November, 2021

There are things that low self-esteem can rob you of without you even realizing it. These could be relationships, career opportunities, and personal satisfaction, to name a few. For this reason, it’s essential to both trust and appreciate your worth on a day-to-day basis. However, there are certain situations that can wear you down and lead you to dangerous feelings of self-indifference.

Having low self-esteem takes away a major part of the things that guarantee your psychological well-being. Self-esteem is like a vital compass that guides you through life. It’s the guiding light that reminds you where your limits and potentials are. It’s also the bridge that allows you to successfully and safely cross over the most complex currents of your existential path.

However, self-esteem doesn’t remain stable throughout your life. As a matter of fact, in reality, there are few dimensions that fluctuate so much in us, as human beings.

For example, a bad relationship or a career failure might mean your feelings of self-esteem are no longer reinforced. Then, all of a sudden it happens. You begin to lose things, your reality becomes blurred, and your mind stops being anchored in its psychological strengths.

“Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasnt worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.”

-Louise L. Hay-

man suffering the things that rob you of low self-esteem

Things that low self-esteem robs you of

Low self-esteem is like a black hole through which a good part of your worth escapes and disintegrates. You stop being you, you underestimate yourself, and you start an internal dialogue that’s as negative as it’s exhausting.

However, according to a study by the University of Basel (Switzerland), negative self-assessment doesn’t necessarily lead to depression, but it does place us in a state of psychological vulnerability. Therefore, it appears that what you feel, think, and believe about yourself directly affects the way you live.

Nevertheless, the most striking fact is that many people with negative self-worth manage to successfully disguise it. In fact, they tend to appear resolute and hide their deflated self-esteem under several layers. However, no matter how much armor they put on, they’re still left feeling extremely low and on the verge of extreme sadness.

For this reason, it’s wise to know what kinds of things low self-esteem can rob you of, so you know when you need to make some changes.

1. Trust in yourself

Without the protection of good self-esteem, everything scares you. Furthermore, in order to feel happy and satisfied, you need to make decisions and undertake the odd challenge. However, if you don’t trust yourself, nothing you aspire to will ever come into your life.

2. The opportunity to enjoy quality relationships

If you don’t love yourself, you depend on the affection of others to validate yourself. Indeed, if you don’t have strong and healthy self-esteem, you’ll fall into the trap of dependent relationships or those that hurt and even traumatize you.

One of the secrets of happiness in a couple is that you have to really love yourself in order to understand the type of love you deserve.

3. Your passions and dreams

Every great achievement was once a dream. A goal achieved by those who trusted in their potential to make their wishes come true. Who wouldn’t want to act in this way?  However, to do it, the first thing you need to do is strengthen your self-esteem.

4. Freedom

Among the things that low self-esteem robs you of is your freedom. That’s because you often tend to depend on third parties for support and validation. This lack of self-love places you indefinitely in your comfort zone, where you subsequently become trapped. 

5. The courage to act

What are you without an adequate supply of courage and bravery? You become a passive person who limits yourself to accepting everything that comes your way without doing anything about it.

6. Companionship and good friendships

With friends, it’s the same as with love. If you go through life’s journey without a modicum of affection for yourself, you’ll be content with whatever comes your way. They could well turn out to be selfish or self-serving friends or narcissistic people, etc.

Sad woman with a lost look thinking about the things that low self-esteem robs you

7. The ability to enjoy simple things

Low self-esteem feeds you with insecurities and fills your head with catastrophe. It whispers things like “Better not do that because they’ll only make fun of you” or “Don’t even try to  do that because knowing you, you’ll only screw up”. In fact, this kind of negative dialogue extinguishes your capacity to enjoy even the most basic of things.

8. Hope

One of the things that low self-esteem robs you of is your confidence in achieving what it is you’re longing for. This negative self-evaluation is like living in a psychological room without windows where you can’t see anything. Indeed, there’s only darkness that’s produced by fear, insecurity, and lack of confidence in yourself.

9. Assertiveness and the ability to defend yourself against what doesn’t suit you

Just think about what it means to lack optimal levels of assertiveness on a day-to-day basis. You stop defending your rights, you don’t set limits, and you’re unable to say “no” without fear and “yes” without guilt. That’s because, to be assertive, you need to have previously developed the good foundations of self-esteem.

10. Belief in the compliments and acknowledgments of others

Among the things that low self-esteem robs you of is the right to accept compliments and to acknowledge your worth. With low self-esteem, if someone praises you for a job well done, you doubt that they’re telling you the truth. Because when you don’t value yourself, you question whether others truly value you.

11. Your voice

Among the things that low self-esteem robs you of is your voice when you comment on something. In fact, your reasoning, your ideas, and your suggestions stop being heard. It doesn’t matter that you’re someone with great potential, bright and creative.

Without self-love and security, you won’t be able to make the world listen to you. You’ll always be more concerned with making mistakes and being judged or observed.

Given all the shortcomings and dimensions that low self-esteem can take away from you, why not act now, before it leaves you exposed? Don’t hesitate. It’s really never a bad time to exercise and strengthen this value of your psychological well-being.

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

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  • Sowislo JF, Orth U. Does low self-esteem predict depression and anxiety? A meta-analysis of longitudinal studies. Psychol Bull. 2013 Jan;139(1):213-240. doi: 10.1037/a0028931. Epub 2012 Jun 25. PMID: 22730921.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.