If I Have to Face Changes, I Hope They're Good Ones

If I Have to Face Changes, I Hope They're Good Ones
Valeria Sabater

Written and verified by the psychologist Valeria Sabater.

Last update: 15 November, 2021

I don’t want to be afraid of life’s changes; I want to breathe, I want to trust them and take them on without resisting them to try and avoid suffering. I want stars that guide me through the path towards happiness.

This is what we all want, without a doubt. However, saying out loud that we’re not afraid of change isn’t completely true, because in some way, we all fear uncertainty, and we fear even more the variations that we don’t provoke, but that life brings by itself.

If you want your life to change, don’t remain seated, because it will never change if you don’t change. The gear that drives the magic of existence is always inside of you.

We’re sure that you’ve already had to go through more than one major change. Some changes came suddenly, and others you initiated by yourself out of necessity. And all of that is good, because if you think about it, the only thing we should be afraid of is regretting not having made a particular change.

Not having said yes to a certain proposal, taking a trip, or leaving everything behind for someone else… These all appear in our minds as doors that we’ll never dare to open, locks for which we’ll never find the keys.

Changes are turns in direction on the path of lifethat sometimes come suddenly, and sometimes arise to put us to the test.

If changes happen, let them help me grow

kid and dog

This is the attitude that we should assume: every change is a significant opportunity for growth, and depending on how we handle it, we’ll get something more or less positive out of it.

People often say that changes themselves aren’t painful. What’s really painful is when we show ironclad resistance to change.

Of course, changes are sometimes traumatic: the loss of a loved one, a failure, a betrayal. However, our attitude and inner strength will be the key that helps us open a new door along the path with more dignity and wholeness, having become wiser because of it.

People who resist change remain stuck in a space between two worlds where the past is on one side, and suffering is on the other. We can’t remain submerged in the memory of a failed relationship, or crying for years over the death of a loved one. We should move forward and let ourselves suffer a little less each day, until the memory becomes a peaceful tribute to the person who isn’t there anymore, while recovering our hope for the future.

Adapting to change is actually something inherent to human beings. You could say that we’re genetically predisposed to change so we can improve and discover new abilities, contexts, and competencies.

It’s all about going with the flow. If we stay attached to a memory, fear, or our comfort zone, sooner or later we’ll become frustrated with ourselvesSo, if changes come, trust in yourself: it’s an opportunity to grow.

bird and lantern

The winds of change will spread my wings

People are afraid of anything that goes against the current, any variation that takes us further from our center, from our daily lives. It feels like losing control and falling into an ocean of unpredictability.

Sometimes, little changes make a big difference, and that’s when we suddenly grow wings. Remember, without changes, butterflies wouldn’t exist.

While it’s true that we all yearn to enjoy a serene existence where happiness is almost guaranteed, none of that could happen if we didn’t first learn to accept changes, and even encourage them.

Because we’re often obligated to turn the pages so we can advance and protect our emotional health or improve our professional lives. Life is a change, an eternal flow where we learn how to get carried away by the current.

To do so, keep the following in mind:

  • Confront your emotional resistance. Understand your emotions and understand that fear aims to chain your feet to the ground. Exchange restlessness for security, and convince yourself that taking the next step will bring you to personal improvement.
  • Change your thoughts and you’ll change your reality. It’s easy, you just have to look at things in a different way. Things themselves change and you’ve already started the gears, you’ve already sparked the magic.
  • Focus on the positives. Avoid falling into negativity and give breath to your hopes. If you want good things to happen, think about them, and focus them on the horizon so they can guide you each day.
  • Remember that in life, everything comes, everything passes, and everything changes.
butterflies and water

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.