The Most Common Sexual Fantasies in Women
It’s possible to devise erotic sequences in your mind that rival even the most passionate scenes in cinema, as our imagination allows us to explore distant territories. And while it’s impossible to generalize based on gender, it’s common for women to include more elaborate elements in their sexual fantasies compared to men.
In the following article, we invite you to learn about the 25 risqué ideas that tend to be repeated most frequently in women.
What are sexual fantasies and what benefits do they have?
A sexual fantasy refers to mental images that involve situations, people, and/or erotic sensations. There’s no set script, as they vary from person to person.
As long as it doesn’t become obsessive and excessive, fantasizing is healthy. On an individual and relational level, letting your imagination run wild regarding sexual content can have great benefits, including the following:
- Enrich stimulation and excitement.
- Explore sexual desires and preferences.
- Reduce stress and accumulated tension.
- Strengthen the emotional connection and intimacy in the relationship.
- Promote adventure and creativity in the couple, avoiding sexual boredom.
It’s important to note that fantasies don’t always translate into real actions nor do they necessarily reflect a real desire.
Each woman is unique in the way she lives her sexuality.Sometimes a person enjoys imagining a specific scenario without having the intention of making it a reality. It’s a safe and creative space of the mind. [/atomic-in-text][atomik-read-too text="Discover" title="The Definition of Erotic Desire" url="https://exploringyourmind.com/erotic-desire/"][/atomik-read-too]
What are the most common sexual fantasies of women?
However, we can’t deny that there are some fantasies that many share in their intimate imagination. Do any of these sound familiar or catch your attention?
1. Domination and submission games
There are women who like to take the reins, and others love to be dominated. These scenes may include power play, surrender, or control in erotic situations.
Interestingly, a study found that BDSM practices – always consensual – reduce psychological stress, in addition to increasing sexual arousal.
2. Romanticism with eroticism
Another of the most frequent sexual fantasies in women is related to the idea of For many, the possibility of living their own cinematic moment, with passionate kisses and caresses that awaken all the senses, is irresistible.
3. Casual one-night stands
Novelty is also a most tempting idea. A fleeting encounter with someone who passes you on the subway or the seductive look of the barista where you bought a coffee could awaken the desire to explore the unknown.
4. A trio
The illusion of participating in a threesome is quite common, both in the male and female population. For many women, the thought of sharing intimacy with two people at the same time is intriguing. This fantasy focuses on the possibility of
5. Sex with another woman while being heterosexual
Sexuality is diverse and the mind explores its limits. Fantasizing about experiences with another person of the same sex, even if you’re heterosexual, is more common than you might think.
In some cases, forms of stimulation, and how one wishes to be touched. It’s believed that, by sharing similar experiences and anatomies, a woman would have a unique sensitivity to satisfy the desires of another.
6. To observe or be observed
Voyeurism and exhibitionism come into play, triggering For some ladies, imagining seeing other people in sexual situations sparks a burning curiosity; while fantasizing about being watched during sexual acts perhaps produces a feeling of empowerment and excitement.
7. Thinking about another person while having sex with your partner
Sometimes the mind seeks variety and additional stimulation to the point of merging desire for a partner with suggestive thoughts about another person. This fantasy, , although its impact varies between couples.
While some find that this idea strengthens emotional connection and intimacy, for others, it generates mistrust, conflict, or feelings of guilt.
[atomik-in-text]Sexual fantasies involving people outside the couple are common expressions of the mind and don’t always indicate dissatisfaction in the relationship.
8. Relationships with a famous person (real or fictional)
Another of the most repeated sexual fantasies among women is intimacy with a celebrity. Singers, actors, and actresses, those faces that seduce us on the screen, often become protagonists of daring fantasies. Have you ever fantasized about Ryan Gosling or Chris Hemsworth playing Thor in an intimate setting?
9. Sex in unusual places
The thrill of the forbidden and the possibility of being discovered makes it exciting to fantasize about sex in movie theaters, bathrooms, or airplanes, for example. The idea of living erotic moments in unconventional places provides a touch of adrenaline, which turns each area into a potential scene of seduction.
10. Try sex toys
From vibrators to Chinese balls or feather handcuffs, the variety of sex toys is wide. Both for women who still don’t dare to use them in real life and for those who’ve already experimented, exploring these elements is a common fantasy for them.
11. Outdoor intimacy
The connection with nature and the feeling of freedom lead some women to fantasies of sexual relations outdoors. A deserted beach, a quiet forest, or a starry sky can become an ideal setting to explore intimacy in the mind in a more passionate and spontaneous way.
12. Sexual relations with a close person
Although this sexual thought may come with a mix of emotions, the attraction of crossing the line with someone who’s close, such as a friend, coworker, or teacher, is intense for some women. It’s common to fantasize about erotic encounters with people who are part of everyday life, even if they don’t translate into real actions.
13. Mutual masturbation
The female imagination sometimes gives rise to fantasies where she and her sexual partner focus on their own masturbation, while sharing arousal through observation. Another variant would include both women stimulating each other simultaneously.
14. Encounters in different places in the house
Intimate encounters in different corners of the house are an exciting way to escape the monotony of bed. Places like the kitchen, living room, or even the bathroom offer innovative ways to connect. Of course, if you want to bring this fantasy to reality, make sure there’s no one else there so you can enjoy the experience to the fullest.
15. Daring oral sex
The idea of taking fellatio or cunnilingus to a more daring level excites some women. Perhaps their minds push them to overcome conventional techniques and venture into more daring and creative terrain. These preliminaries not only play a prominent role in real life but often play a relevant role in fantasy.
16. Incorporate food into the sexual experience
Including food in sexual activity can add a unique sensory dimension when coming into contact with the body and skin of the partner or sexual partner. For this reason, there are women who think about the excitement of playing with juicy strawberries, melted chocolate, whipped cream, or honey during their intimate encounters.
17. Sexual interactions in exchange for money
This erotic fantasy involves entering the field of seduction and intimacy in a more transgressive context. In this case, what’s attractive is the act of immersing yourself in the complexity of roles, power, and taboos. It’s an idea that usually remains in the realm of the imaginary, but, as we already mentioned, in the mind, there are no forbidden limits.
18. Being surprised with a spontaneous encounter
The idea of arriving home, discovering that your partner is waiting for you with no clothes on, and with the clear intention of giving in to passion is a scene that many women find irresistible in their sexual fantasies.
19. Being discovered in the act
Another of the most common female sexual fantasies is linked to an intimate encounter when there’s the possibility that someone will enter the room in the middle of the act. This could occur, for example, during a social gathering at home with visitors or at a large party. Such a situation awakens a feeling of morbidity, adrenaline, and challenge.
20. Blindfolded sex
With our vision turned off, the rest of the senses are intensified. The idea of diving into this game of trust and pleasure, where you let yourself go without knowing what comes next, is exciting.
21. Play with your partner under fictitious identities
In this case, you and your partner adopt false identities for a secret encounter, using disguises, invented names, and a mysterious atmosphere. This is an imaginary adventure that incorporates mischief and intimacy.
22. New sexual positions
The desire to explore different positions that allow you to vary your routine and discover new forms of pleasure is a fantasy that many women share. Experimenting with new sexy positions tends to revitalize intimacy and take connection to a deeper level.
23. Sex in the workplace
The idea of making love after or during the workday, whether in the office, warehouse, or music studio can seem very tempting to many women. From the furtive touch of hands in the meeting room to passionate whispers in a discreet corner, the thought of exploring intimacy in the workplace awakens intense emotions of desire and secrecy.
24. Recording yourself or using mirrors during sexual acts
Placing mirrors strategically to visually enjoy the sexual experience is stimulating. Hence, many women fantasize about this and, sometimes, about video and sound recording to later relive the moment and see themselves in full excitement.
25. Wear sensual lingerie
Choosing provocative and sensual intimate clothing can be part of any sexual fantasy. This not only enhances self-esteem but also creates a most suggestive erotic environment. In addition, some women imagine scenes in which their partners remove or even tear off their underwear in the midst of passion.
Are there differences between what men and women fantasize about?
All this being said, the frequency of sexual fantasies generates conflicting opinions. While some claim that men have them more often, others claim that the differences aren’t that great, but that women admit it less.
As for the content of those sexual fantasies, experts also differ. Some sexologists suggest that, in reality, there are more similarities than differences between the sexual imagination of the female and male population.
Others argue that men’s fantasies tend to be more graphic and physically focused and that women tend to incorporate emotional or contextual elements. For women, the details of the setting and the sequence are more elaborate, as well as linked to romanticism and seduction.
It’s interesting to note that these differences may be conditioned by culturally ingrained gender stereotypes. However, it’s important to remember that each person, regardless of gender and sexual orientation, has their own fantasies.
There’s no established standard, and the expression of each fantasy is as individual as each human being.
Learn more Multiple Orgasms in Women: New Research
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Fantasizing is part of healthy sexuality
Fantasies are a natural and healthy part of many people’s sex lives. They’re even considered an excellent form of self-exploration and self-knowledge, in addition to serving as a stimulus in intimacy.
They’re also understood as a way to escape from daily stress, so there’s no need to feel shame about them. As long as they don’t negatively alter your daily life, you shouldn’t shy away from experiencing them.
All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.
- Ambler, J. K., Lee, E. M., Klement, K. R., et al. (2017). Consensual BDSM facilitates role-specific altered states of consciousness: A preliminary study. Psychology of Consciousness: Theory, Research, and Practice, 4(1), 75-91. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2016-45384-001
- Montas, R. E. A. (2020). Fantasías sexuales femeninas: tipología, actitudes y contenidos (tesis doctoral, Universidad de Almería). Dialnet. https://dialnet.unirioja.es/servlet/tesis?codigo=265568
- Moyano, N., & Sierra, J. C. (2014). Fantasías y pensamientos sexuales: Revisión conceptual y relación con la salud sexual. Revista Puertorriqueña de Psicología, 25(2), 376-393. https://www.redalyc.org/pdf/2332/233245622014.pdf
- Nimbi, F. M., Galizia, R., Limoncin, E., Levy, T., Jannini, E. A., Simonelli, C., & Tambelli, R. (2023). Sexual Desire and Erotic Fantasies Questionnaire: The Development and Validation of the Erotic Fantasy Use Scale (SDEF2) on Experience, Attitudes, and Sharing Issues. Healthcare, 11(8), 1159. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10048620/
