I Got Tired of the Way You Loved Me

You’ve gotten tired of the way they loved you. Maybe they told you they loved you, but it wasn’t enough… You feel like you’re the last of their priorities; you feel alone in the relationship because they’re always busy, or working, or with their friends or family. They don’t understand the value of balance. Everything is important to them: work, family, friends…you?

You feel broken over their constant absence, their lack of intimacy, kisses, caresses, and hugs. Again and again you break like a vase that you keep trying to put back together, until it finally breaks into a thousand pieces, beyond repair.

There’s no remedy for what you tried so hard to explain to them. You’ve gotten tired of the way they love you. And now you’re crying, too. You cry with nostalgia, while you listen to that song that once united you over laughter, caresses, and kisses in an old bar that isn’t there anymore.

And now there’s nothing between you, everything has broken

“I know that you’re crying, that you’re sad, that you’ve realized what you lost. But now I’m gone. I was empty, I got tired of the way you loved me. I have nothing to give you anymore, nothing to offer you.

Now I live in another world, I tell different stories, and another love occupies my heart. I don’t feel like you’re a part of my life anymore, I feel like nothing unites us. I cried a thousand tears for you, I opened my arms to you a thousand times, but not anymore…I got tired of the way you loved me.

And even though I didn’t intend to and didn’t believe it would happen, another love has come into my life, giving me a new sense of hope and desire to live. Now I’m happy, because we know how to take care of each other, love each other, and laugh together. He knows how to love me like no one has before. He knows how to take care of me, and I take care of him. He understands that we are a team and that together we can make it to the end of the world, because this love is about the two of us.”

Maybe you can identify with these words. When we feel like we’re invisible, like we’re in a relationship that pushes us aside…we become overwhelmed by suffering and pain, while we watch the relationship disappear without being able to do anything about it.

What often happens is that partners have different concepts of love, or don’t communicate their needs and feelings in the right way, waiting for the other person to guess how they feel, which is impossible if they don’t talk about it. Assumptions are dangerous, and even more so in a relationship. Passivity towards the relationship makes the flame slowly fade away, little by little.

What can be done to keep the flame of love alive?

Love is a beautiful work in progress. After the first few moments are gone, we should keep fighting for that love, if it’s really what we want. Love needs to be watered as if it were a small plant, always making sure that the flame does not go out, always rekindling the fire. How can this be done? Is it possible? Anything is possible if we want it and put effort into it. The following advice will help you:

• Win it back. In love, not everything is earned. You have to fight and win back lost kingdoms every day. Surprise your partner again, pay attention to detail, call them on the phone, take walks together, tell them about your day. Reignite the love that used to unite you.
• Don’t neglect the relationship because of convenience. Many people think that their love has given way to a convenience that’s comfortable for both partners. But it’s not like that. Love is like a little flame that always needs to be kept alight.
• Don’t be so absent. When we have a thousand things to do, like work for example, we tend to neglect our relationships. Don’t forget that love is like a job…if you don’t show up, you could lose it. Find time for your relationship.
• Don’t stop talking to each other. Communication is the foundation of any relationship. When we talk to other people about our lives, we feel closer to them. Don’t go to bed without talking to resolve your differences. Ask for forgiveness. Don’t be proud or embarrassed. Timely forgiveness can prevent a thousand more obstacles.

If you really feel like they’re the person you want to be with, don’t abandon them. Keep building your relationship together in spite of all the changes and differences that may occur. Love and routine have never gotten along well…