Cry When You Need To

Cry When You Need To
Sergio De Dios González

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Sergio De Dios González.

Written by Okairy Zuñiga

Last update: 21 December, 2022

Contrary to what you may think, human beings are not the only creatures that cry. All mammals are capable of showing their pain, loneliness, and sadness in some way. The biggest difference is that we are taught when it is a good moment to cry and when it is not.

Girls are told that it is good to cry because it is a form of self-expression, but later they are labeled as overly sensitive. Men are taught that they must not cry because this is a sign of cowardice. And so we grow up, some of us with more “freedom” and others more repressed. In truth, we should all cry when we need to. 

“Cry, yes; but cry standing up, working; it is better to sow new seeds than cry over what has been lost.”

-Alejandro Casona-

Explore your feelings in greater depth

Cry and you will discover feelings and emotions that you may have forgotten. Has it ever happened that you start crying over one thing and end up crying over something completely different? This happens because you do not give yourself the chance to release your emotions when they develop.

“Crying does not indicate that you are weak. Since birth, it has always been a sign that you are alive.”

-Charlotte Brontë-

Woman Crying in Rain

By letting anger and pain accumulate without dealing with them, they become a sort of poison. Some people prefer to keep these emotions as far away as possible. This is a mistake because the deeper you dig, the better you can know yourself and the freer you will be. Do not be afraid to discover your deepest fears and desires. Only by crying at these moments can you feel truly free.

Cry to cleanse your soul

Just like a good shower will clean your body, tears clean the soul. After crying, you will feel liberated, have more energy and desire to move ahead, no matter how bad everything seems. We gather up so many things that we do not dare let go because we believe that this would be more complicated and painful for us or for others. The problem is that all of that sadness, frustration, fear, and anger will also hurt you.

“Sometimes we do not get to choose between tears and laughter, but only choose between tears, and then between all the tears, one must know how to decide on the most beautiful ones.”

-Maurice Maeterlinck-

You will also have had time to see what is hurting you. The next step will be to create a strategy for moving forward and fixing your unresolved problems. Do not stop; cry as much as you need to, then keep moving forward. After all, there are also tears of happiness.

Tears heal the body

Sometimes we forget that our mind and body are connected, treating them as two completely different things. This is a serious mistake because when the mind is sick, the body is as well.

Woman Against Rainy Window

For this reason, it is not uncommon to see people with depression or who live in profound solitude who display serious physical problems. Another example is stress, which can provoke back pain. Take care of your body and cry without limits when you need to. Your body is much wiser than you may think and it will always give you a sign of what you need.

“The tears stream down my cheeks from my unblinking eyes. What makes me weep so? From time to time. There is nothing saddening here. Perhaps it is liquefied brain. Past happiness in any case has clean gone from my memory, assuming it was ever there.

-Samuel Beckett-

Crying reminds you that you are human

Cry not only for your health; also do it to get in touch with your most human side. We grow up with the idea that crying makes us seem weak or defeated. Maybe this is true in some cases, but it is also a way of getting in touch with your most fragile, human side.

“Very often the tears are the last smile of love.”


Give yourself a chance to cry in front of others, even if you think that it will be weird or annoying for them. Tears can help you better express your feelings and they are permissible when they are real. What you have to avoid is using your tears as a form of blackmail. Do not feel ashamed of your need to cry. There is no real reason to avoid it. Forget the idea that crying is bad!

Image courtesy of Christiaan Lieverse

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.