You Create Your Own Problems

You Create Your Own Problems

Last update: 16 May, 2018

Life can take many turns. Things don’t always go the way we’d like, which is a good thing. However, problems crop up left and right…or do they? What is a problem, really? Do we have as many problems as we think we do, or do we complicate life by thinking that something is wrong?

In reality, your attitude determines whether you have a problem and how big it is. It’s how you evaluate a situation that makes it a problem, or that turns a challenge into a threat.

If you accept things for the way they are, you’ll be able to take advantage of the opportunities for learning and growth they provide. Acceptance is one solution to adversity, to adapt and start anew, when there’s no other way to innovate or when the price for any alternative is too high.

View your problems as opportunities

Whether or not you like it, want it, or are prepared for it, adversity will cross your path at some point. You’ll have a lot of questions when that time comes, but the most important one of all is what are you going to do next, and how will you incorporate what you learn from it into the future? In other words, are you going to let the situation become a problem, or will it just be another opportunity for learning and growth?

flowers growing in crack in the street

It’s normal to feel pain and worry at first. It’s even healthy to take some time to let pain do its job. If you resist it, you’ll just prolong the agony. Pain is a natural feeling, and you have to leave room for it. Once the emotional pain passes, then it’s time to really confront the situation.

Despite how much it can complicate life, adversity can also be an opportunity to get to know yourself better, to value what you have, to value yourself. This approach doesn’t change what happened or give you a solution, but it does give you the opportunity for discovery, which is an amazing thing in itself.

“Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents, which in prosperous circumstances would have lain dormant.”


Accepting and adapting to change

Learning to adapt to new situations, no matter how difficult they are, is the secret to living a full and happy life. It seems hard, but it is possible. But it isn’t enough to simply adapt; you also have to be able to accept what happened. This will always be the start of change, whether it’s in your environment or within yourself.

Adapting doesn’t mean conquering adversity, it just helps you take back control of yourself. Like Bernabé Tierno said, you can face anything, but you can’t conquer everything. Only acceptance will allow you to truly adapt and take full advantage of every moment of your life.

“Everyone’s life, especially your own, should be one of constant acceptance, adaptation, and renewal.”

-Bernabé Tierno-

Learn to accept what you can’t change

Happy are those who learn to accept what they can’t change, according to Friedrich Schiller. No matter how hard the change or how difficult the problem, learning to deal with it, accept it, and adapt yourself to the situation is often the only way to move forward. Any other alternative, if there is one, would cost too high a price than you could pay.

While you’re learning to accept and adapt to change, you’ll also have to face other changes, because that’s the dynamic nature of life. In those cases, your first reaction might be fight or flight, which are innate survival instincts that influence your actions when you feel threatened.

girl hugging flowers

But when you’re able to mentally adapt to a situation, however hard it is, then you’ll have a much easier time. People who can accept and adapt to change are also able to look in new directions and make decisions based on their new reality and new goals.

Instead of lamenting what you don’t have, enjoy what you do have

You have a lot of problems if you let adversity get the best of you, or if you let yourself be overcome by the pain of loss. Your problems will become a heavy weight that will hold you back.

Difficult situations don’t have to become exhausting and disappointing. They don’t have to be the end to your hopes and dreams. With courage and optimism, you can find and take advantage of new opportunities, which present themselves to everyone all the time. Your limits are not limitations. There’s still a long way to go, even though your supports are behind you.

It might be tempting to stay down on the ground when difficulty arises. That’s the easy path. You can mourn the loss, failure, or illness, but don’t make that place your home. You still have so many opportunities that could fill up your life. But in order to take advantage of them, you have to accept the change that’s occurred and use it as a starting point to begin adapting.

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”

-Friedrich Nietzsche-

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.