I Want A Hug Neither Fear Nor Winter Can Penetrate

I Want A Hug Neither Fear Nor Winter Can Penetrate
Gema Sánchez Cuevas

Written and verified by the psychologist Gema Sánchez Cuevas.

Last update: 21 February, 2022

I need a hug, I need your arms to surround me and not leave any space for fear or the cold of winter. I need to feel protection in the face of the things that hurt me, the things that make me sad. I don’t want just any hug, though; I want a really strong one, where words are not necessary because your body engulfs mine and transmits your energy to me while I hug you with all of my heart.

Make me forget what is hurting me and remind me that life is warmth, home, friendship, love. There is no need to say a single word, because your hands on my back and your head resting on my shoulder will speak to me of your appreciation, your affection.

“I hug, pure delight, your unrecognizable face, identical to my soul.”

-Marguerite Yourcenar-

Why do we need hugs

There is evidence that children need hugs because these signs of affections, hugs, kisses, caresses, are beneficial for growth and they increase oxytocin levels. And when we grow up and become adults, we receive very few hugs; we dedicate very little time to physical contact with other people.

Children Hugging Sunset

It seems that we are afraid to show what we feel, to express care and affection, to touch each other and feel our skin touching the skin of another person. We need hugs to feel protected, so that they can send us energy, to remember that there is someone for whom we really are important, to feel comforted. If you need a hug, tell the person you want it from or hug them spontaneously.

“If I knew that this would be the last time you pass through this door, I’d embrace you, kiss you, and call you back for one more.”

-Gabriel García Márquez-

The benefits of hugs

Hugging another person has many benefits, and there are several scientific studies that have shown that physical contact makes us feel better about ourselves, has a positive effect on the development of our intelligence, and can produce physiological changes. Hugging is just one form of physical contact, but there is no doubt that it is a special one.

Hugs increase oxytocin levels

A hug increases our levels of oxytocin, the hormone that gives us a feeling of wellbeing and reduces our stress levels, thereby reducing our blood pressure and heart rate.

When we hug, the receptors in our skin awaken and send signals to the vagus nerve in our brain, which is responsible for reducing our blood pressure. A study carried out in 2010 by the University of Miami concluded that the more hugs we experience, the lower our blood pressure is.

Hugs help with communication

When we hug, we create trust, affection, love, which is why communication with the other person who is wrapping us in their arms improves and we will feel very good. Words are not necessary because the gentle pressure of a body and arms on us leads to trust being built on its own.

Hugs improve our self-esteem

When someone hugs you, it increases your self-esteem because you feel like the other person appreciates you and is sharing this with you through their hug. In 2012, a study was published in the Journal of Science Psychology revealing that hugs greatly reduced the fear of dying and improved attitudes in the face of fears.

“Stay with love that gives you answers and not problems, security, and not fear, confidence, no doubts.”

-Paulo Coelho-

Hugs promote empathy and understanding

With a hug, we can put ourselves in the shoes of the person whom we are hugging and allow that person to put themselves in our shoes. We can manage to make a stranger, a friend, or our partner understand and support us. Our need to be understood by others is human, and sometimes with a simple hug, we can feel the support that we need.

Couple Hugging About to Kiss

We have to try to recover our closeness to people, because due to the proliferation of social networks and the use of cell phones, relationships today are becoming ever more cold and there is no space to listen, to look into each other’s eyes, to caress, kiss, or hug.

It is essential for our wellbeing that we find time for physical contact with others, that we encourage hugs. Therefore, hug and let yourself be hugged, enjoy the warmth and the intimacy that is created with a long, tight hug.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.