There's No White Without Black, No Good Without Bad

There’s no white without black, no happiness without sadness. When it comes to colors, the ones we like depend on our taste, at least partly. However, when we talk about emotions, it seems less varied. We reject the ones that make us upset and embrace the ones that make us feel good. However, without some, there wouldn’t be others, at least not in the same way. Would you be able to value joy if you had never experienced sadness?

We tend to run away from bad situations. Or sometimes, we’re content to suffer and be a victim of circumstances that we believe we can’t change. This passive attitude takes away our responsibility over our own lives. But if you’re going to submerge yourself in all of these negative experiences, why not appreciate the opposite?

There’s no white without black

The real reason we plunge ourselves into the negative without being able to see the positive originates from our hopes and expectations of what we think will make us happy. We think that a complete life should be full of happiness, where there’s no lack of money, no getting laid off, no illness, no toxic relationships.

We run away from all of that, just like we run away from the mistakes we’ve made. When we can’t escape, we get sad, but that’s not what should happen. Thanks to all of those experiences, we know how to appreciate the opposite: the beauty of balance, of everyday life, of abundance, of having our needs satisfied.

Why do we fail to appreciate the bad if it allows us to see the good, and even leads us to it? If you had never made a mistake, then you’d probably know half of what you know today. If you’d never lied, you wouldn’t appreciate it when other people don’t lie, because you wouldn’t know how tempting it can be. Similarly, if none of your friends had ever disappointed you, you wouldn’t know what true friendship is. Much of the knowledge we gain comes from hardships.

It’s in the relationships that cause us the most suffering that we most feel the need to be loaded with positive emotions. All because we make the mistakes we mentioned before, although here it’s much more pronounced. In our relationships, whether they’re with friends or partners, our expectations influence the disappointment we feel.