Telltale Signs that Your Lover Truly Cares About You

You must care about a person if you really love them because loving is caring and hoping for the best for the object of your affection. These clues will help you know if your lover truly cares about you.
Telltale Signs that Your Lover Truly Cares About You

Last update: 03 April, 2021

What are the telltale signs that your lover truly cares about you? Many people will tell you that “you’ll know in your heart”. However, doubts always linger in the mind, as people often pay attention to dimensions and details that aren’t really that meaningful. For example, it’s useless for them to tell you how much they love you when they don’t have any interest in talking to you or doing things together.

Loving isn’t only about living together or meeting each other’s parents but about being truly close in body, mind, and heart. To love is to care and, above all, to show genuine concern for one another and to know how to reciprocate those needs. Few relationships are as caring as they are demanding.

Also, while it’s true that stress or work may keep you from being as attentive to your significant other as you’d like to be, there must always be a sense of co-responsibility. You must be there for one another in times of difficulty. The task of affection is a matter of full-time attention and dedication you can’t neglect.

A loving couple.

Ways to know if your lover cares about you

A happy and satisfying relationship is built from many dimensions that go far beyond love. There must be empathy in addition to affection. Also, an ability to reach agreements and share values, be partners in crime, and understand each other.

Likewise, an essential pillar in the relationship is sensitivity towards the other and the ability to respond to their needs, no doubt. This dimension, responsiveness, is a subject that science has been studying for a while. Thus, and as an example, the study conducted at the University of Rochester presents a scale that’s now used for assessing relational competence.

The established items can help you find out for sure if your partner cares about you and if they’re responding to your needs. This is an area of interest to most people, so you must understand and delve deeper into those components that make up one of the foundations for relational happiness.

1. Active and sincere listening

This makes you feel present and validated. You know that those in front of you are receptive not only to the message you send but also to the emotions you transmit. Authentic listening implies interest, empathy, and, of course, concern.

2. Genuine interest in what you think and feel

How do you know if your partner is interested in you? Well, there are many ways to know. First of all, they care about what you say, remember it, and act accordingly. They also show you through the little daily details.

Likewise, they take your opinions into account and respond to them. Last but not least, they’re in tune with your feelings, interested in them, and look out for your well-being in every circumstance.

3. They try to understand your perception of things

You must determine whether your partner is sincerely empathetic to find out if they truly care about you. Are they capable of putting themselves in your shoes to understand why you feel a certain way? Can they appreciate your perspective and reality?

It’s true that nobody is perfect and neither is love, what matters is the genuine understanding of who your significant other is and to take it into account at all times.

4. A person who cares about you is attentive to your needs and responds to them

It isn’t enough that your partner knows you had an awful day. Knowing how to respond implies knowing how to act and there must be a willingness to make the other person feel good. This is because it’s always possible to make one’s partner feel good, within your own limits, of course.

5. They take your concerns seriously

You should pay attention to your partner’s words and behavior in order to find out if they truly care about you. “That’s nonsense” isn’t a loving answer and it’s evidence that a relationship isn’t on the right track.

Likewise, there’s a problem if they choose to focus on themselves instead of taking your concerns seriously.

6. They make decisions with you in mind

It’s permissible for a person in a relationship to make their own decisions. However, every step must be consensual and take into account the other person’s opinion and point of view.

For example, you have an offer for a promotion at work and it requires you to be away from home several days a week. Thus, you must make a decision considering what your significant other thinks about it.

7. A person who truly cares about you considers your feelings

Respect for another person’s emotional reality is a pillar you can’t hit, notch, or lacerate in any way. Thus, you must value how your partner makes you feel in order to know if they truly care about you.

Emotional respect provides security, reinforces self-esteem, and strengthens affection.

Love is attention and interest. However, this interest isn’t only focused on whether your partner has had a good or a bad day. It also focuses on every day, on whether they’re sleeping well, on whether they’re enjoying the TV series you started watching, or if there’s a tinge of concern on their face you don’t know the origin of.

Gazing is a telltale sign that your lover truly cares about you.

9. A person who cares about you makes you their priority (realistically)

To love is to prioritize what you loved above most things. This is why it’s important to perceive this preference on a daily basis. Note that it isn’t the same as that blind and even dangerous obsession in which you neglect yourself to focus exclusively on your loved one.

It mainly consists of perceiving that the other takes you into account and puts you ahead of many things. They choose you every day and under any circumstances. This undoubtedly builds a solid bond through which trust and security flow and which allows advancing in happiness and balance.

Finally, take these dimensions into account and don’t limit yourself to wonder if your significant other truly cares about you. Instead, evaluate how much you actually care about them.

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  • Crasta, D., Rogge, R. D., Maniaci, M. R., & Reis, H. T. (2021). Toward an optimized measure of perceived partner responsiveness: Development and validation of the perceived responsiveness and insensitivity scale. Psychological Assessment. doi: 10.1037/pas0000986