What Smart People Do When They Are Not Accepted

· February 6, 2017

It would be great to always be surrounded by tolerant and humble people. But the reality is often quite different. If there is a common characteristic that defines mediocre people it is their ability to blur and humiliate those who make are more successful. It’s as if it is in this way that they avoid a kind of threat; as if humiliating intelligent people makes them smarter.

On the other hand, let’s face it: being smart in a mediocre environment is difficult. But if you really are as smart as you think, you will not try to show that you’re above anyone. Moreover, your attitude towards this fact says a lot about you.

Surviving mediocrity is a cross between accepting oneself and understanding that it is not necessary to cause anyone to be that way. Nor is it a matter of dumbing down to be accepted by others, even though it can sometimes be an effective way to go unnoticed and not suffer the wrath of those who feel threatened by you. In fact, if you really are an intelligent person, you can even take advantage of of the circumstances without offending  anyone or feeling offended yourself.

Intelligent people know that they will not be liked by everyone

No person pleases everyone. Being smart does not make you nice, essential or a good person. Smart people should not fall into the trap of thinking that being more clever makes them better people or someone other people want to know.

Your ideas, your hopes and dreams, your knowledge or your values may offend a lot of people. That makes you a more competitive person and can make the inferiority of others clear, but that does not necessarily mean you have to change.

man giving his opinion to who two colleagues at a meeting


Smart people recognize and accept that they are not going to be liked by everyone and therefore do not allow themselves to offend or try to defend themselves against those who do not understand them. In addition, they assume that these kinds of people that do not like them are not bad people.

Smart people ignore those who are not their taste

Accepting that there are people who do not like you doesn’t mean integrating them into your world. Smart people know how to distinguish those people who do not accept them and decide who they with interact with and who they will not. Being smart means not taking everything that’s thrown at you.

But, as they say, “Politeness does not take away bravery”. That’s why smart people treat everyone with courtesy, regardless of their feelings toward those people and how unpleasant and offensive they can become. This makes it easier to avoid future confrontations.

Sometimes this courteous treatment may involve swallowing a toad and even dumbing down. In essence, this way of acting is very clever at times and can prevent unpleasant situations that do not lead to anything. It may even be a real challenge of intellect and emotional control.

Smart people focus on themselves

To conceal their own incompetence or to try to look smarter than they are, some people focus their energies on annoying and humiliating those who stand out or have proved to be smarter. This is very frustrating. But intelligent people learn to handle the frustration that this kind of attitude generates.

To do this, instead of focusing on how irritating these people are and defending themselves from their offenses, smart people focus on themselves, who they are, and on their own values. This is not about defending oneself from others, but from oneself.

intelligent woman thinking

In addition, smart people try to discover what the factors are that trigger the attitude of those who are not accepting in order to not provoke them. In this way it is possible to anticipate, soften and even change the reaction. Intelligent people know it is easier to change their perception, attitude and behavior than asking someone to be a different kind of person.

Smart people stop and breathe deeply when faced with drawbacks

Instead of violently reacting to an uncomfortable situation when they are not accepted, smart people are able to stop and breathe deeply in order to not get carried away by anger or negativity. Thus, smart people prevent themselves from being hurt by the attitudes of others.

Pausing and breathing deeply can control the adrenaline rush caused by certain situations and allow you to stay calm in a difficult conversation or to let it pass. Breathing deeply helps you avoid an overreaction and continue with an open mind and a positive, light attitude.

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