You Played With My Heart and Ended Up Losing Me

You played around with my heart and ended up losing me. You bet my heart in a match that you thought would be fun, and you ended up making us both suffer for love. Because if you treat love like a game of chance, luck may end up making you pay the price.

You decided that with me you were going to simply have a good time. Therefore, you thought that by acting like a gentleman, you might manage to close the deal. That you would enchant me with your lovely words and empty promises. That way, you would obtain what you wanted. But, due to destiny’s surprises, a destiny which you cannot control, now you’ve had to swallow your own words.

Because all of the promises, empty from the start, changed their meaning as my smiles got bigger. You liked being by my side but then everything you played around for got out of hand. And the question arrived, a question with no logical answer, it was simply a whim: Why did you play with my heart?

“Don’t deceit a real woman. Don’t kiss her without caring about her, don’t use her without loving her. You should treat a real woman as if she were truth itself. As if she was time, as if life were to end with every kiss.”
Mind of Brando

Don’t promise me stars if you can’t even light a candle

Snake charmers use music to get what they want. In your case, you played with words in your attempt to obtain what you wanted. Lovely words which charmed the mind and sprayed my face with sweetness in order to use it as a canvas for wide and ample smiles. I lost all reason when it heard the sound of your voice.

But your actions had nothing to do with the words you said. They betrayed the mirage created by your way of stringing sounds into letters and words. Your actions were a reflection of your heart of stone.

Love is made of the little details, not the big words. Love doesn’t involve promising stars. It consists of being able to light a candle during dinner. Of tucking the hair being her ear if it is bothering her, of being able to lend her your jacket if she’s shivering.

“Love doesn’t need to be understood, it only needs to be shown.”

-Paulo Coelho-

That’s why you didn’t achieve what you wanted, because I have self-love. And I asked for something real, not a mirage. And you weren’t counting on that. But, while showing off your great stubbornness, you decided that you wouldn’t give up on your mission. You kept fighting for what you had bet on and played the game even harder. There was no hesitation when you doubled your wager, when you thought you had intuited how it would all play out.

You played with fire and ended up getting burned

Without even noticing, days went by and things weren’t going how you wanted them to. You started feeling comfortable by my side. You started to share small details of your everyday life with me. Somewhere along the way, you stopped playing and let your guard down. That’s when you started showing me your soul.

“What will you do when you don’t want to like me, and you’ll love me without meaning to.”
-Mind of Brando-

Because, how tightly do you need to hug someone in order to soften a stone heart? I never stopped hugging as hard as I could. You ended up confessing to all of your games when you started trying to win me over. All of my cards were hearts, and all you had were clubs and spades.

That drove a chasm between us. No longer did I know if any of what you said was true or if it was simply one more trick to get what you wanted. I lost the trust I had in you and everything you said. I hated you with all of my might as you broke my heart. And you learned that, one can’t fall in love in a day… nor can one forgive and forget.

And much less can you forgive someone who has played with you as if you didn’t have a heart. No one is forced to love anybody else. If you hurt someone by playing around with their feelings, it was your choice to do so. You played with fire and ended up getting burned. Because no one knows what the heart wants until it can’t be controlled. Now there is no room for forgiveness. You are now sad and alone. I suffer, but at least I still have my self-love.