It’s Not The Burden That Destroys You, It’s How You Carry It

· January 31, 2017

You’re tired and you know you bear a heavy load, even though at first glance there is nothing on your body that shows it. That burden is as real as it is invisible and it squeezes you, pushes you to make you fall, drowns you, makes you anxious. Sometimes you’re lacking air in your lungs and you feel the time going by while you’re still there, trying to escape what haunts you.

What we call a burden is a mass that exerts a weight on us, a force that acts as a hindrance against the movement that we generate in our bodies and in our minds voluntarily. That’s why we we also call the experiences and events that put us against the wall emotionally a burden.

The emotional burden

Life is not as free as it seems. There are different prices that we have to inevitably pay. One of them is to not allow ourselves to experience emotions, both good and bad.

woman hugging her cat representing forgiveness

Much of what we experience is difficult. These burdens can be small and light or so large and traumatic that it is best to seek professional help to deal with them.

“The only way to combat congestion is to reduce the burden.”

-Andrew Tanenbaum-


However, in either case, the burden is there and whether it destroys you or not depends on the tools you employ to deal with it and the will you have to get rid of it.

Tools to help you manage

One of the keys to emotional intelligence is to work with tools that help us improve the contact that touches our hearts: negative events will be part of you forever, but there is no reason for them to become burdens. How can we achieve this?

  • Understanding the damage: it is likely that you feel cornered by negative thoughts and you even feel like your heart adds to the weight you feel on your back. It would therefore be very beneficial for you, right where you are, to focus on the damage that is bothering you and set limits.
  • Knowing that you want to achieve it: as much as we seek it out it is very difficult to find the desire to transform that mood, but it is possible. We have the ability to take the will from within us when we need it most. Your willpower will be the only thing that gives you enough strength to shape the way you live with your burdens.
  • Being aware that forgetting is not overcoming: the majority of burdens come from the past because they are feelings that we pick up along our way. Remember that joys are like wings to keep flying, and sorrows can also be the trampolines that force us to learn from our mistakes. Let them in, express them and release them to overcome the past.
  • Confidence in your inner strength: although in certain circumstances it can be of great use to talk about what ails you with someone, you cannot forget that your burden is yours and learning to live and get rid of it is a process of self-knowledge and personal growth.
woman with butterflies on her back

 “Remember what’s worth remembering. Ignore the rest.”

-John Katzenbach-

Take out the weight of the soul, carry the teaching as your baggage

When we go on a journey where we need to carry  bulky luggage, we need suitcases to put it in and, above all, organization to find out what is most important and what is less important. With the experiences we gather in our life, the same thing happens: if we try to move forward with a soul full of weight, we will not be able to continue.

woman blowing glitter

In fact, the moment you’re released from your burdens and gather the inherent teaching after having carried them, you will realize that just like when you pack your suitcase for a trip, you’ll be able to select what emotions to take with you and how you have to carry them.

The mind feels light. Neither emotions nor thoughts weigh anything, but rather they are that tailwind that adds speed to the sailboats.

“No need to load our thoughts with the weight of our shoes.”

-André Breton-

In short, the way you carry your emotional baggage is a sign of inner maturity: remember that it is there to teach you something and feel more or less heavy in the same way that you learn from it.

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