Love Means Wanting to Be Together
Those who seek you out for some ulterior motive don’t deserve you. Their true interest is not you as a person, but what they can get out of you. In their mind you are a means to an end, not an end in and of itself. They will come up with a thousand and one ways to get what they want, and when they finally do you will just be one more person on their list. You deserve so much more, you deserve true love. Love means wanting to be together.
Someone who truly loves you doesn’t need you, they prefer you. They don’t choose you just to use you for their own benefit, but to share their time and open their heart to you. Their eyes and actions give them away. Sincere love and emotions are obvious and you can feel them.
Let’s explore the difference between someone who loves you out of self-interest and someone who loves you because they are truly fond of you.
True love is free of need and self-interest
Where love is present, there is more than self-interest: there is a shared interest. Instead of being needy, love gives us the will and the desire to conjugate verbs in the plural. A person who truly loves you chooses you for who you are and accepts everything about you, the good qualities and the bad. A person who truly loves you tries especially hard to love even your defects.
At the end of the day, someone who truly cares about you doesn’t worry about the time of day you call them or the number of times you see each other, they are simply there for you. They know you and they know that even when you are smiling, on the inside you might be falling apart. Their only intention is to help you put the pieces back together.
A person who feels true love for you shows you their feelings in small actions, without expecting anything in exchange. They aren’t motivated by self-interest, but by the well-being that they feel when they make you smile or wrap you up in a hug. And even when you get angry, they will try to understand you in spite of believing that you aren’t always right because they put your relationship above little fights.
A person who truly loves you wants to magnify your happiness.
The one who gives you their time, gives you life
The most beautiful gift that a person can give is to share their time with you. They are giving you their minutes, hours, and seconds and in turn, part of their life. Those who love you know this well.
Late-night coffees, quick visits during your break at work, a call or a “Good morning” message on Whatsapp… These are all actions that show affection and appreciation on the part of those who carry them out.
The person who gives you their time is giving you a part of their life simply because they love you, without expecting anything in return. They do it because they want to and because you are on their list of priorities and of people they care for. One minute is enough to let you know that you are important to him or her. Even a few seconds could be enough to leave an indelible mark on your heart if those seconds are filled with meaning.
“There are magical people, I swear to you. I’ve seen them.
You can find them hiding in the corners of the earth. They are disguised as normal and their specialty is blending in, trying to act like everyone else. That’s why it’s sometimes difficult to find them, but when you discover them there is no going back.
You will never be able to forget them.
Don’t tell anyone, because they say that their magic is so strong that if it touches you once, it holds you forever.”
-Anonymous-
The person who truly loves you wants to share their time with you. He or she will be comfortable and calm spending time with you. Someone who is doing it out of self-interest will feel that they are wasting their time, which is why they won’t always be available.
Be with those who add to your life, not with those who subtract
Someone who truly loves you adds to your life, and someone who only loves you out of self-interest will take away from your life. Those who act for their own benefit, risk ending up alone.
Try to surround yourself with those who love spending time with you, even if you are only chatting on the couch. Distance yourself from those who only call you when they need you.
Life is full of wonderful people, and also those who haven’t yet been able to wake up and feel what love and appreciation for others can give to them. But you have the power to choose with whom you have relationships. Don’t forget that the person who truly appreciates you offers themselves without demanding anything from you. They give, they don’t ask. They value you, they don’t destroy you. Someone who truly loves you doesn’t just say it, they also show it.
