Learn to Acknowledge and Face Your Feelings
There’s no one more blind than those who don’t want to see. Pain, sadness, and anguish don’t just disappear by magic. You can’t just close your eyes to these things, or snap your fingers and change them. You have to start to acknowledge that pain exists and learn to face it.
Even if you’re scared, or you think that the worst is coming, things usually aren’t as bad as we anticipate. One of the biggest demons we must face is our own catastrophic thinking (which some people feed into because they think it will protect them from disappointment). It takes courage to fight these demons.
But how do you face the thing that scares you the most? Step by step – and the first step is to admit your own internal struggle, to stop denying your suffering, to stop telling yourself that nothing bad is happening even while you’re screaming on the inside. Once you acknowledge your distress, you’ll uncover your biggest fears, which will allow you to find the best weapons to face them with.
The world is a hostile place for everyone, but only those who face it without fear will be able to live their lives fully.
Feeling the weight of the world
At first, you’ll feel the weight of the world on your shoulders, and it will seem like everything is turning dark around you. But you’ll realize that you just have to put a name to the panic or depression that has taken hold inside you. Once it has a name, it becomes less scary, because you know what’s happening and you can ask for help facing these apparent threats.
“Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself.”
Giving your feelings a name doesn’t meaning reducing your reality to a label. Nor is it an excuse to hide behind every time you make a mistake, or a complete definition of yourself. It’s just a part of the whole, but it doesn’t define you, because you are much more than that.
Giving the problem a name doesn’t mean you should forget about the context in which it arose, the support you have, or the resources at your disposal. It’s just a way of simplifying an accumulation of emotions, thoughts, and behaviors that would otherwise be difficult to understand.
But again, simplifying doesn’t mean you forget that behind every name, every fear, every demon, there’s a person with their own story. A person who is suffering, who is courageous, who needs support and understanding.
“Don’t love who you are, but who you can become.”
Don’t waste your time denying reality
Don’t waste your time denying reality. What’s the worst that can happen if you choose to acknowledge what’s going on? What’s the worst that can happen if you stop avoiding life experiences? There’s a world full of possibility on the horizon; you just have to start experiencing it in all its intensity.
At that point, your demons won’t be the only things that occupy your thoughts. Rather, a whole bunch of possibilities, both good and bad, will open up in front of you. This will allow you to get to know yourself at every level, and to accept yourself unconditionally. But most importantly, it will make you see that you are stronger than you ever imagined you could be.
“Growth begins when we begin to accept our own weakness.”
-Jean Vanier-
You’ll be scared, but you’ll have thousands of weapons to use. You’ll be hurt, but you’ll also feel the love and affection of the people around you. And you’ll realize that the way you control yourself when you try to live a life without pain is the worst damage you can do to yourself, because you’re denying a part of your reality.
Remember, we aren’t happier when we feel less. We’re happier when we acknowledge and accept our emotions. Whether you live or hide is in your hands. Whether you accept and face your feelings or not is in your hands. If you do, the result is always hopeful. The hope is yours, for you to share and spread to your loved ones.
