What to Do When You FeeI Like You Just Can't Take Anymore

"I can't take it anymore!" How many times have you found yourself saying these words? Here, you can find out how to deal with the feeling of wanting to leave everything behind you and to start living your life to the full.
What to Do When You FeeI Like You Just Can't Take Anymore
Valeria Sabater

Written and verified by the psychologist Valeria Sabater.

Last update: 21 December, 2022

You have good days and bad days. Occasionally, for no apparent reason at all, you feel unable to get out of bed and face the day ahead. These are the times you find yourself saying “I just can’t take anymore”.

Your body and, above all, your brain, have magnificent defense mechanisms that often allow you to hide your problems, wounds, and weaknesses by means of an iron shield. Behind this, you can simply pretend nothing is happening.

You go on to ‘automatic pilot’ and manage to operate reasonably efficiently over weeks and even months. However, finally, the moment will come when your real problem appears and your body will stop reacting. Consequently, you’ll lose your strength, and weakness will prevent you from carrying on.

This time, your brain is unable to provide you with that mild sedative. In fact, everything that’s been hidden suddenly emerges. What can you do? How can you overcome those days when, simply, you just can’t take anymore?

Learn to listen to you

There are many reasons behind these realities, the most common being those associated with high levels of stress and anxiety. Because, although the stress in your body is intended to put you on alert, you won’t be able to endure this situation for long. In fact, cortisol will make slight changes in your body such as raising tension or speeding up your heart, which will gradually damage you internally.

Indeed, your automatic pilot will work for a while but, sooner or later, will fail. The same goes for any emotional problem. For example, you may have difficulties with your partner, or perhaps you’ve lost someone and haven’t had time to face it yet.

Some people prefer to return to their normal life without having experienced grief. They tell themselves it’s better not to think about it. That’s until the moment comes when they can no longer cope.

Hiding a reality will bring you nothing but long-term problems. You’ll become exhausted and simply won’t know how to face it.

You must allow yourself the gift of listening to yourself. That’s because it’s impossible to deal with everything at the same time and manage to stay well.

Overcoming the feeling of “I  just can’t take anymore”

Man thinking he just can't take anymore

Undoubtedly, the most important thing is to avoid reaching these kinds of situations in the first place. Therefore, you must learn to manage your stress, establish your priorities, and deal with any affective or emotional event that happens in your life, without displacing it.

However, if, in the meantime, you find yourself in the kind of situation that takes your breath away, leaving you with the feeling that you simply can’t take anymore, think about putting the following guidelines in place :

1. Don’t force yourself

If your body and mind tell you that you can’t, listen to it and don’t force yourself. In fact, if you make yourself get in the car and go to work, your body will most likely react with dizziness and vomiting. The time has come to obey it and stay put. It’s the moment to face the situation and think about yourself.

2. You first

From now on, you’re at the top of your list of responsibilities. The time has come to help and listen to you. You deserve it and need to do it. You need time for yourself.

Find out what triggered the state you’re in. Is it work? Is it someone from your emotional circle? Is something wrong with you? Analyze it calmly.

Think about how you feel and express your feelings. If you need to cry, cry. If you need to be angry, be angry. Relief is essential to start to change.

3. Look for solutions

When you’ve understood what caused this situation, calmly think about possible solutions. Consider how you really want to feel and what you should do to achieve it.

Think about achievable goals. For instance, “I want to be calmer and think about nothing but my family. Therefore, do I really need to carry on having so many responsibilities at work?” or “I want to stop worrying, be myself again, and regain my self-esteem so I think it’d be better if I left my current partner as they’re making me so unhappy.” These arguments are well worth listening to.

Woman looking out the window thinking I can't take it anymore

4. Make decisions

Once you’ve clarified what’s causing you to feel this way, and you know the steps to take to improve the situation, it’s time to make decisions. Depending on the nature of the problem, they could involve pretty drastic actions. On the other hand, if they’re not so serious, you can take things slowly in order to regain your confidence.

Convince yourself that everything in life has a solution.

Remember that the most important thing is your happiness and peace of mind. You need to wake up every morning with a smile, not feeling afraid that you can’t cope. No one should ever reach this state. You have every right to be happy and you certainly deserve it.

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

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  • Pietromonaco, P. R., & Markus, H. (1985). The Nature of Negative Thoughts in Depression. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology48(3), 799–807. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.48.3.799
  • Nanayama Tanaka C, Higa H, Ogawa N, Ishido M, Nakamura T, Nishiwaki M. Negative Mood States Are Related to the Characteristics of Facial Expression Drawing: A Cross-Sectional Study. Front Psychol. 2020 Dec 17;11:576683. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2020.576683. PMID: 33391093; PMCID: PMC7773925.
  • Kocalevent RD, Hinz A, Brähler E, Klapp BF. Determinants of fatigue and stress. BMC Res Notes. 2011 Jul 20;4:238. doi: 10.1186/1756-0500-4-238. PMID: 21774803; PMCID: PMC3148561.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.