True Love Is Repaid with Love
We all deserve to experience true love that pushes us to be better every day, with honesty and without pretenses. The kind of feeling that calms your fears and nurtures you on the inside. The kind that lets us be our true selves, makes us happy, and never causes deliberate harm.
We all deserve to find ourselves in someone else’s heart and feel like we can communicate with them without needing to pretend or struggle to keep them close. We all deserve for love to flow and for reason and emotion to align with each other.
Find the love of your life every day in the same person
If it’s allowed to grow, love is the most fulfilling and gratifying feeling, in any of its forms. That’s why falling in love should never be bitter if it’s returned sincerely and openly.
Love is both commitment and freedom. It encourages you to choose the same person to share your life with over and over again. It’s understanding teamwork in a relationship and taking advantage of it to create a separate world where you can feel safe.
It’s realizing that the most beautiful things in life cost triple the price, and not forgetting that over the years. Renewing emotions, assembling a puzzle where the commonalities fit in with the discord, and running the risk of jumping into the unknown, knowing that you might fall.
Love knows nothing but tenderness, respect, and mutual affection. It is heat, impulse, idealization, meaning, and life. So why do we accept when it turns cruel? Why do we keep calling it “love” when there is none of that left?
“If at some point life mistreats you, remember me, and that you can’t get tired of waiting for the one who never gets tired of looking at you.”
-Luís García Montero, Dedicatoria-
If it causes harm, it’s not true love
The simple yet complicated experience of being in love causes people to sometimes accept unacceptable situations. Love that obligates you to suffer in search of the endings you see in the movies isn’t real. Love sometimes hurts, but it never causes harm on purpose.
When two people love each other, the only purpose that exists is to see the other person happy, even if they decide to leave for some reason. It’s not reciprocal love if it’s toxic. It’s not healthy if you have to deny who you are to maintain it.
“You can’t stay in the same place if you can’t grow, even if you like it.”
If there is jealousy, ignorance, and psychological and/or physical abuse can’t be called love, because true love is repaid with love and affection.
You have to love yourself first
Society would have us believe that one person loves another in order to feel complete and to not feel alone. It’s the idea of finding your “other half” that you’re missing, to complete yourself and be happy. However, this notion is erroneous and even dangerous.
Some of the greatest thinkers in history, in fact, have defended the impossibility of loving another person unless you love yourself first. This would suggest that we are already complete, and that we have to cultivate self-love before we can share it with others.
“When you understand that love is not seeking someone who has what you lack, but rather someone who understands you, who makes you feel, find their gaze…where you can live forever.
If you want an honest relationship in which you can offer each other the possibility of getting to know each other, first you have to know yourself. Understand exactly what you’re looking for, what your fears and desires are, how you can grow personally, and to what extent the other person would change their path. In other words, in order to love someone well, you have to love yourself and be prepared for both things.