I No Longer Want to Be Perfect

Wanting to be perfect is a mistake. We're all only human.

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Gema Sánchez Cuevas.

Written by Sofia Alcausa Hidalgo

Last update: 21 December, 2022

From now on, I’m going to demand less of myself and less of others. I want to make mistakes, without fear and regret. What’s done is done and, although in the past I made certain wrong decisions, I did it because I genuinely thought they were the best choices to make at the time.

I want to be imperfect, not to demand so much from myself or from others, and to recognize that we’re all flawed. I don’t want to feel guilty and hold grudges toward others, as I know this only causes me pain.

I want to own my decisions and not always be dependent on the approval of others. Of course, I’ll listen to them and their advice as long as it’s made in good faith, but I’ll make sure I always have the last word.

I no longer want to be perfect

I don’t want to keep kidding myself. Because, at the end of the day, deep down, I know what’s really good for me. For example, if someone tells me that bungee jumping is the best experience ever and that I should try it and stop being a coward, that doesn’t mean I’m going to do it. I’ll only do it if I want to.

Therefore, I’ll make the decisions that I think are right and if I’m wrong, I’ll wipe the slate clean and start again. Because that’s the game of life. Sometimes we’re right and sometimes we’re wrong.

I don’t want to be perfect

We’re all imperfect. We all make mistakes because it’s human to make mistakes. For this reason, I’ll lower the bar. I don’t want to put more pressure on myself. I don’t want to continue being the perfect child that everyone loved and praised. Now, whoever wants me can accept me with both my virtues and my many flaws.

I’m going to remain calm with myself and stop weighing myself down and tormenting myself with the mistakes I’ve made.

Finally, I’ve no longer any interest in being perfect. I want to learn to be a little indulgent with myself. I know it’ll be hard because I’ve always demanded too much of myself but I’m willing and eager, eager to try, and that’s why today, I’m happy.

Some tips for perfectionists

Learn to love yourself. You can be self-critical with yourself but without destroying yourself. You learn a lot from your mistakes, they’re the basis of your learning.

If you make a mistake, think about the anxiety it causes you. Take care of your mind and your body. For instance, you can do meditation, relaxation, or any other activity that helps you to disconnect. Remember, you don’t like seeing your loved ones hurting, and your most important loved one should always be you.

The saying that claims you learn from your mistakes is correct. They help you improve and grow.

Look around you, are others perfect? No, they’re not, so why should you be? Don’t be afraid that, because of your mistakes, they’ll love you less. Those who love you, love you for you, the full package.

“When you repeat a mistake, it is not a mistake anymore: it’s a decision.” 

-Paulo Coelho-