Sex isn't Natural, it's Cultural

How many times have you heard the differentiation between “natural sex” and “unnatural sex”? These definitions have arisen due to prejudices that have haunted us for years. As a matter of fact, at a time somewhat distant from today, relationships were considered to have a reproductive purpose only. It was only later that the idea that it was natural for humans to have sex for mere pleasure was defended.

However, the naturalness of sex is not as we perceive it. We believe that it means freedom. Nevertheless, this isn’t really the case. For instance, do you think you’re free when you have sex? Do you consider that you have no limits? As a matter of fact, nothing could be further from reality. Indeed, in sex, culture influences you more than you think.

Sex isn’t natural, it’s normal

When we refer to sex as something natural, in reality, we’re referring to it as not being viewed strangely, but as a totally normal, valid, and acceptable action. In other words, we understand it as a natural practice. However, the word “natural” refers to nature. This is what Valérie Tasso, writer, and sexologist, claimed in one of the many conferences in which she’s participated.

Sex is natural in animals. They’re not influenced by any culture, and they’re not educated in accordance with any specific beliefs. On the other hand, human beings are. For example, our conception of relationships with other people, our own vision of the world wouldn’t be the same if we were born in another country. For this reason, it’s important that we highlight some of the most interesting points that Valérie Tasso made regarding this vision of sex.

• Sex holds value for us. In this way, it doesn’t make us more like animals, but more human. For instance, think about how much you reflected on whether or not you were ready for”your first time.” Indeed, we all have values in our heads that condition us.
• Morality isn’t universal. If it were, we’d all maintain the same sexual practices. Japanese, Arabs, Americans… everyone is different with respect to sex. That’s because customs and norms aren’t the same in one place as in another.

Nevertheless, we tend to consider that sex makes us more like animals. Hence, prejudices arise. Repressed people worry about what’s right and what’s wrong, what’s “natural” and what isn’t. Who determines this? Without a doubt, it’s the culture itself.

Sex within culture

Sex is a cultural act. In fact, it’s rather like going to an exhibition or a museum. We learn everything from a very young age. For example, you’ve learned that you can’t have sex in the middle of the day in a park no matter how much you may feel like it. In effect, you’ve been taught how to have sex.

However, this presents a problem. For instance, think of when you travel to other countries and you’re faced with the inevitable culture clashes. It’s the same with relationships. The history of each place is different and, therefore, its people are different. For instance, in countries like Japan, men are said to be extremely cold. On the other hand, Latinos are viewed as passionate. Indeed, there are great differences based on the culture that permeates each of the territories that exist in the world. Furthermore, these differences enrich us as human beings.

Sex and religion

There can be little doubt that everything related to sex is strongly linked to religious beliefs. In fact, whether you consider yourself an agnostic or an atheist, the place where you were born will always have an associated religion. Furthermore, they’re impregnated in the culture that conditions you. The one that makes you see your relationships and your way of living in a particular way.

Did you think that sexuality was natural? Did you consider that your way of seeing and experiencing it was free from any influences?  As a matter of fact, at the end of the day, sex is like going to the theater. You might go once with one person, another time with another, sometimes with two people. Or, maybe you go to see a ballet or a play. Whatever you choose, everything that happens on the inside is influenced by the outside.