If one day you see me looking sad, don’t say anything, just love me. Sometimes when I’m broken inside, I don’t need anyone to put me back together, I just need someone to be with me while I put myself back together.
If any time you notice sadness in my gaze day after day, don’t race to ask me what’s wrong, how I’m feeling or what’s made me feel this way. Please, first try to embrace me with the warmth of your presence. Ask me fewer questions, give me more hugs.
Because when I feel sad and down, when sadness hurts and my mind is blocked, all I need is to be alone knowing that someone is with me. Don’t ask me not to be sad, not to cry or not to go into my own world.
If some day you see me crying, remind me, put a hand on my shoulder and invite me to speak, even if it’s only to speak of time. Because the complicity of your presence will be enough for me to feel the comfort of home.
If one day you feel that I’m sad, don’t run away from my sadness. Don’t give me the message that I’m undesirable, don’t make me feel dispensable nor useless. Because if you can’t tolerate my shadows, you don’t deserve to enjoy my light either.
Remind me that the suffering that’s upsetting me today will help me to examine my inner world, to breathe and to order my thoughts.
If some day you see me looking sad and you don’t know what to do, leave me to understand that I’m important, but respect my need to go inwards, to embrace myself, to examine myself. Don’t let me block my sadness because it helps me to reflect and analyze my world.
If some day you see me looking sad, don’t say anything. Just love me. If you find me in the loneliness of the dark night, don’t ask me anything, just be with me. If you look at me and I don’t look at you, don’t think about it, just understand me. If what you need is love, don’t be afraid, love me.
If one day I feel sad, I will try to talk to you when I have the strength. I will try to feel important, to accept the nuances and appreciate the kindness and affection that resides in the fact that you held me when I needed it.
The importance of sharing this message
This message could be written by any of us at a difficult time. It doesn’t matter whether we are children or adults, a hug without being questioned helps us to normalize our emotions and to receive the message they are giving us.
For us to trust in ourselves, it is essential that those around us don’t judge or look down on our emotional state and that our worth is not determined based on our suffering.
There are hugs, words, looks and hundreds of gestures that transmit a message. What the reaction of others to our sadness teaches us socially and emotionally reaches deep into our being.
If the people around us respond with rejection, we will probably end up feeling that there are emotions that aren’t worthy of respect. This often results in a false identity of being excessively happy and optimistic.
But sadness also forms part of us and our circumstances, which are deeply affected by the nuances within us. That’s why, if we ever see anyone around us looking sad, we must not reject them. It’s about doing exactly what we would like them to do for us. No more, no less.