Kind Children Will Become Kind Adults

November 13, 2016

We live in a world in which war and peace live side by side, where people use other people for their own benefit, even if the price for that benefit is death. A world that adults participate in and that children learn from.

The difference between children and adults is innocence. Both cause harm, but children do so without knowing about the consequences and without accepting the price of their actions. However, the same does not always happen with adults. We are aware of the harm that our actions will cause, and yet, we still take these actions.

Most children are born with a certain predisposition for caring for others, especially their family. They’re born with a type of kindness, a sense of helpfulness and altruism that nobody taught them. It’s in the hands of their caregivers to ensure that when they lose some of their innocence, which is a logical and natural process, this predisposition remains.

Ways to maintain kindness in children

Teaching and modeling tolerance and patience

One of the keys to raising children without frustration is patience, which will show them what they have to do or what’s expected of them. This will create, not a sense of obligation, but rather of adult and mature conversation. You have to be tolerant with them sometimes so that they can feel like they have a certain amount of control over the situation, without going too far.

sleeping girl

These two keys, patience and tolerance, must be internalized and serve as guides in their interactions with other people. A tolerant and patient society is an understanding and respectful society.

Please, thank you, and I’m sorry

These three expressions must be ingrained in them so they can become polite and friendly people: please, thank you, and I’m sorry.

They have to learn to be thankful, that they get what they get because they deserve it, not because of chance or luck. It will teach them that almost anything can be achieved with effort and dedication, and that they deserve to get what they receive.

Asking for things politely will differentiate them from rude people who prioritize speed and obligation to have their demands met. A simple “please” completely changes the meaning of what they’re asking.

If they know how to recognize and fix their mistakes, regardless of the reason, they’ll always be learning through absorption. Asking for forgiveness will make them honorable and consistent with their actions.

Attachment as a main tool

Creating a healthy attachment marks the difference between one child and another. A familiar warmth must be created that can be a source of comfort and consistency for them. This will create a safe environment where they can play and explore the world. They don’t have to be afraid of anything, because they can always count on the security of their family.

This kind of attachment is created most effectively when you observe them carefully and keep calm. If the child falls and scrapes their knee, the caregiver mustn’t panic; they must remain calm and pretend it’s not important. This will calm the child and make it so that in the future, they’ll almost laugh when they fall down in the park.

mother holding daughter

Remember that the child’s fear doesn’t go away when you surround them with gifts, but rather when you teach them to put their trust in others, in the world. If we teach children that the world is full of danger, we can’t be surprised in a few years when they become fearful and emotionally dependent adults, especially in the face of obstacles.

Teaching kindness

There are many studies that show how children have a natural tendency to help, share, and in short, be socially healthy and kind. This tendency can be maintained over time, which prevents them from being poisoned by the bad social habits that surround them.

For this natural inclination to remain, you just have to act towards them the way you expect them to act in the future, thereby cultivating their sensitivity towards others and reducing bad behavior.

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