Being a Financially Dependent Adult
Whether we like it or not, money is a really important part of life. The world of finances has become more complex with globalization. Plus, purchasing power is much lower now than it was some decades ago. Economic crises happen. That’s why there are many adults who are still financially dependent on their families.
From a practical point of view, financial dependence is a viable and supportive solution to this particular problem. But from a psychological perspective, it leads to a series of difficulties when it comes to wanting to establish certain essential goals.
In fact, being unemployed and financially dependent also has an impact on self-image and self-esteem. Many think that depending on others is ‘comfortable’. However, it can cause a lot of damage.
“Money is the root of independence and the companion of integrity.”
-Lord Chesterfield-
Parents and financial dependence
Setting aside the fact that there are circumstances where finding a job is a very difficult endeavor, there are also cases where financial dependence is encouraged by the parents. In this sense, many parents that complain about their child not being independent maintain habits that foster it.
There are many reasons why this may happen. The most common one is that one or both parents don’t feel comfortable with their own lives. Therefore, their children become their excuse not to face other challenges.
There are also parents who have relationship issues that they’ve been overlooking. These parents use their children to avoid conflicts or as a distraction. If their adult child becomes independent, they have no option but to work on their relationship.
Similarly, some parents fear loneliness or don’t want to face the well-known but ugly truth: kids always end up moving away. And when this happens, although their parents may still be part of their lives, they won’t be their main focus anymore.
Parents who enable their children to be financially dependent
Many parents accidentally encourage financial dependence. They’ve overprotected their children since they were very young, making them insecure and dependent. When their children try to make lives of their own, these parents discourage or manipulate them not to.
Children who have been raised like this are more likely to be financially dependent adults. These children are less confident and don’t want to take the step of moving out. They need their own place in the world but don’t know how to build it.
Also, they don’t feel capable of succeeding in doing so. This makes them take underpaying or unstable jobs or not do anything at all to get a new job when they lose their old one.
Being a financially dependent adult: A problem with a solution
When someone doesn’t believe in themselves or what they’re capable of doing, pursuing financial independence stops being an option. Actually, self-efficacy is one of the most effective predictors of this.
The world can be threatening and unapproachable in their minds, so they rather stay at home with their family. Fear defeats them. They prefer to be criticized or not enjoy the privileges of independence than experience the thrill of challenges.
Insecure parents tend to raise their child just like them. Instead of making an effort to find the perfect job, these children should focus on trying to get rid of the fears that don’t let them move on. Actually, if they don’t solve these issues, it’ll be very hard for them to achieve their goals.