How to Be Your Best Version

The path to being the best version of yourself won't be the easiest in the world, but it'll be the most rewarding. Here, we tell you how to achieve it.
How to Be Your Best Version
Sergio De Dios González

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Sergio De Dios González.

Written by Okairy Zuñiga

Last update: 10 December, 2022

Everyone wants to be their own best version. However, very few of us succeed. In fact, we’re often our own worst enemies when it comes to achieving success and living the lives we want. We self-sabotage with behaviors that keep us in our comfort zones and don’t allow us to move forward. We might even develop self-destructive behaviors -such as addictions- that only worsen our physical and mental health.

But why does this happen? Why do so many of us have a hard time getting the best out of ourselves? There are many reasons and they depend on our individual personal histories. That said, in most cases, there’s a deep fear of being wrong, of the unknown, and of losing what we’ve already achieved.

Also, many of us ignore our potential and believe that we’re incapable of achieving great things. In these cases, we’re suffering from low self-esteem. It clouds our judgments and fills us with insecurities.

We know how difficult it can be to achieve the best version of you. So, we’re going to give you some tips.

How to be your best version

First of all, you must keep in mind that working on your best version is a never-ending task. After all, it’s always possible to enhance your strengths, improve your flaws, and acquire new skills.

Your way of being varies throughout your life. Therefore, in moments of crisis or vital situations, you should look inward and identify the aspects of your personality that you can improve in order to grow as a person.

Taking this into account, let’s take a look at some tips to help you become the best version of yourself.

1. Stop talking negatively

I’m a complete failure in love” ” I’ll never have the body I want ” “My life sucks “. These are just a few examples of the kind of internal dialogue that devalues you and condemns you to fail.

When you talk negatively to yourself, you convince yourself that certain irrational ideas are real and true. This is a real problem because it means you sabotage yourself or stop trying things. Therefore, learning to silence negative self-criticism is extremely important. You must begin by becoming aware of it.

Woman thinking in the field

To do this, pay attention to how you talk to yourself when you make a mistake or don’t get what you want. Identify your negative comments and rephrase them into more positive versions. At first, it might be complicated but, with practice, you’ll recognize your inner self-sabotaging dialogue and be able to modify it more easily.

2. Avoid criticizing and judging others

Have you noticed how easy it is to criticize others? It gives you a feeling of superiority, even if the criticism is unfounded. But, behind this feeling lies low self-esteem. It means you resort to devaluing others in order to feel good about yourself.

If you want to achieve the best version of yourself, you need to avoid judging others and start working on your self-love. You must begin to value yourself as you are. You’ll soon see that criticizing others is meaningless.

3. Work on your fear of failure

As we mentioned earlier, one of the reasons that prevent you from being your best version is the fear of failure. Perhaps you really want something but don’t dare to aim for it because you’re afraid of making a mistake. So, you choose to avoid risk and spend all your time feeling like something is wrong with your life.

The most genuine people are those who know what they want and go for it.

Those who don’t recognize what they want only end up accepting what life gives them. Don’t be afraid of being wrong. Mistakes are the best source of knowledge and growth.

4. Identify what you want and do it

If you spend your whole life running from failure, you may end up doing things you really don’t want to. For example, studying something that doesn’t even interest you or marrying someone who doesn’t make you happy.

Your best version appears when you risk finding yourself. Dream and do what you can to make those dreams come true.

Forget about being the perfect person for others. That person doesn’t exist and the search will make you very unhappy. If you’re going to please someone, let it be only you.

Don’t let someone tell you you can’t do something just because it’s out of the ordinary.

Happy woman with closed eyes

5. Surround yourself with people who motivate you

Another way to be the best version of yourself is to surround yourself with people who make you improve. When your friends and family speak to you positively and motivate you to achieve your goals, the road is easier and more rewarding.

Therefore, if your friends and family aren’t exactly good company, look for other alternatives. Don’t completely abandon your current friends, but give yourself permission to meet new people who generate good vibes.

You can also look for advisors, therapists, or coaches to help you find the motivation you need.

6. Know yourself

Self-knowledge is essential to achieve the best version of yourself. You can’t achieve it without knowing what your desires, inclinations, strengths, flaws, feelings, opinions, etc. are.

In addition, self-knowledge is key to boosting your self-esteem, channeling your emotions, directing your own life according to what you desire, and being more genuine. In short, being a better person.

To do this, keep a personal diary where you record your thoughts and emotions. Make a list of your strengths and weaknesses, be open to new experiences to identify your hidden passions, and practice meditation and psychotherapy.

7. Deal with conflict

Running away from your problems doesn’t make them disappear. On the contrary, it strengthens them. However, you often avoid them out of fear or because you don’t know how to deal with them.

You must bear in mind that problems are inherent in life. You’re always going to run into difficulties that you must face and overcome properly.

Therefore, if you want to be the best version of yourself, you must learn to resolve your conflicts assertively. It’ll make you more successful in life.

8. Don’t look for happiness in material objects

If your happiness depends on material goods you’ll never really be happy. Remember that well-being and fullness come from within. It means working on your self-love, being grateful for what you already have, and establishing healthy bonds with those around you.

You must learn to identify what’s really valuable in your life. This will help you be the best version of yourself.

9. Live in the present

Many people spend their lives longing for the past or dreaming of a better future. It’s not necessarily bad to look back at your past to learn from your mistakes and appreciate what life has given you. Nor is it a mistake to devise or plan for a better future.

However, if you spend most of your time living through nostalgia or expectation, it becomes a problem. Your life passes you by and you let go of the small pleasures that the present brings you, those that give you great satisfaction.

10. Practice self-care

You’re the most important person in your life and you should treat yourself as such. To do this, take care of your physical and mental health by eating a balanced diet, exercising, sleeping adequately, leaving time to enjoy yourself, and connecting with others, etc.

Likewise, avoid the behaviors that may be causing a lot of damage to you. For example, alcohol, tobacco, or other toxic substances.

11. Learn something new

Life consists of continuous learning. Therefore, the more things you learn, the better you’ll feel about yourself and the world around you.

Learn from every person you meet, every place you visit, and every book you read. Learn from your good experiences but, above all, from your bad ones. They’re the greatest teachers.

Are you ready to be yourself?

As you can see, the path to being the best version of yourself won’t be the easiest in the world Whether you achieve success or not will depend on your attitude.

You’re ready to find yourself when you’re willing to overcome challenges without excuses. Otherwise, you’ll fail hopelessly.

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  • Hardy B. Transforma tu personalidad: Códigos para conseguir la mejor versión de ti mismo. Madrid: EDAF; 2021.

The contents of Exploring Your Mind are for informational and educational purposes only. They don't replace the diagnosis, advice, or treatment of a professional. In the case of any doubt, it's best to consult a trusted specialist.