Be the Best Version of Yourself

The path to being the best version of yourself will not be the easiest in the world, but it will be the most rewarding. Here we tell you how to achieve it.
Be the Best Version of Yourself
Sergio De Dios González

Written and verified by the psychologist Sergio De Dios González.

Last update: 11 October, 2023

We all seek to be the best version of ourselves, but very few achieve it. And when it comes to achieving success and living the life we want, we are often our own worst enemy.

We sabotage ourselves with behaviors that keep us stuck in our comfort zone and do not allow us to move forward. And we can even develop self-destructive behaviors – such as addictions – that only worsen our physical and mental health.

But why does this happen? Why do many find it difficult to bring out the best in themselves? The reasons are varied and depend on each person’s personal history. However, in most cases, there is a deep fear of making mistakes, of the unknown, of losing what has been achieved…

Furthermore, many of these people ignore the potential within them and believe that they are not capable of achieving great things. In these cases, we are faced with low self-esteem that clouds our judgment and fills us with insecurities.

In this way, we know how difficult it can be to achieve the best version of yourself. That is why, below, we show you some recommendations to achieve this.

How to be the best version of yourself?

First of all, we must keep in mind that working on the best version of ourselves is a task that never ends. Well, we can always enhance our strengths, correct our flaws and acquire new skills.

Furthermore, our way of being varies throughout our lives. Therefore, in moments of crisis or life situations, it is advisable to look inward and identify those aspects of our personality that we can improve to grow as people.

Taking this into account, let’s see below some recommendations that will help you be the best version of yourself.

1. Stop speaking negatively

“I am a failure in love”, “I will never be able to have the body I want” and “my life sucks” are just some examples of an internal dialogue that devalues us and condemns us to failure.

When you have this kind of negative conversation you convince yourself that certain irrational ideas are real and true. This is a real problem because it causes you to sabotage yourself or stop trying things. Learning to silence negative self-criticism is very important and you must begin by becoming aware of it.

woman thinking in the fields

To do this, pay attention to how you talk to yourself when you make a mistake or don’t achieve what you want. Identify negative comments and rephrase them into a more positive version.

At first it may be complicated, but with practice, you will recognize your self-sabotaging internal dialogue and you will be able to modify it more easily.

2. Stop criticizing and judging others

Have you noticed how easy it is to criticize others? We do it because it gives us a sense of superiority and control. To be the best version of yourself you need to remove all the negative energy from your life The first step may be to avoid judging others.

Allow yourself to get to know those around you know without any expectations or attempts to control. Each of us is different and that’s fine. Everyone lives as they want and you must do the same.

3. Work on your fear of failure

We already said it at the beginning, one of the reasons that prevent you from being the best version of yourself is the fear of failure. Maybe you want something with all your desire but you don’t dare to take the plunge because you’re afraid of making a mistake. So you choose to avoid risk and spend time feeling like something is wrong with your life.

The most authentic people are those who know what they want and go for it.

The rest are just satisfied with receiving what life gives them. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, mistakes are the best source of knowledge and growth.

4. Identify what you want and do it

This has a lot to do with failure. If you spend your entire life running away from failure, you’ll probably end up doing things you don’t really want to do. From studying something that doesn’t even interest you to marrying someone who doesn’t make you happy.

The best version of yourself appears when you take the risk to find yourself. Dream and do everything possible to make those dreams real.

For your part, forget about being the perfect person for others. That doesn’t exist and the search will make you very unhappy. If you are going to please someone, let it be only you.

Don’t let someone tell you that you can’t do it just because it’s not normal.

happy woman with her eyes closed

Finally, forget about being perfect for everyone else. It’s impossible and trying to achieve perfection will make you very unhappy. If you’re going to please someone, let that someone be you.

5. Surround yourself with people who motivate you

Another way to be the best version of yourself is to surround yourself with people who make you better. When your friends and family speak positively to you and motivate you to achieve your goals, the path is easier and more rewarding.

In case your friends and family aren’t exactly good company, look for other alternatives. Don’t completely abandon your current friends, but give yourself permission to meet new people who generate good vibes. You can also look for advisors, therapists or coaches to help you find the motivation you need.

6. Know yourself

Self-knowledge (Spanish link) is essential to achieve the best version of ourselves. Well, we will not be able to achieve it without knowing what our desires, inclinations, strengths, failures, feelings, opinions, etc. are.

Furthermore, self-knowledge is key to enhancing self-esteem, channeling emotions, directing one’s life according to what one wants, being more authentic… in short, being better people.

To do this, you can keep a personal diary where you record your thoughts and emotions; make a list of your strengths and weaknesses; be open to new experiences to identify hidden passions; practice meditation and, of course, psychotherapy.

7. Face conflicts

Running away from problems does not make them disappear, on the contrary, it strengthens them; nor does it make us better people. However, many times we avoid them out of fear or because we don’t know how to deal with them.

For its part, we must keep in mind that problems are inherent to life. We are always going to encounter difficulties that we must face and overcome appropriately.

Therefore, if we want to be a better version of ourselves, we must learn to resolve conflicts assertively. If so, we will surely do better in life.

See also: Why You Must Stop Avoiding Conflict

8. Don’t look for happiness in material objects

If we depend on material goods to be happy, then we will never be happy. Remember that well-being and fulfillment come from within, working on our self-love, being grateful for what we already have and establishing healthy bonds with those around us.

To the extent that we learn to identify what is truly valuable in life, we will undoubtedly be forging a better version of ourselves.

9. Live in the present

Many people spend their lives longing for the past or dreaming of a better future. Now, it is not bad to look back at our past to learn from our mistakes and value what life has given us; Just as it is not a mistake to devise or plan a better future.

The mistake is in spending most of our time living in nostalgia or expectation. Well, that’s how life goes by, letting go of the small pleasures that the present brings us and that, without a doubt, give us great satisfaction.

10. Practice self-care

You are the most important person to yourself and you should treat yourself as such. To do this, take care of your physical and mental health by eating a balanced diet, exercising, sleeping adequately, leaving a space for enjoyment just for yourself, connecting with others, etc.

Likewise, avoid those behaviors that may be causing a lot of harm to you, such as the consumption of alcohol, tobacco or other toxic substances.

11. Learn something new

Life is a continuous learning. Therefore, the more things you learn, the better you will feel about yourself and the world around you.

So learn from every person you meet, from every place you visit, from every book you read… Learn from the good experiences, but especially from the bad ones, because they are great teachers.

Are you ready to be yourself?

As you can see, the path to being yourself is not the easiest thing in the world. But what will make the difference between success or failure is your attitude.


All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.


  • Hardy B. Transforma tu personalidad: Códigos para conseguir la mejor versión de ti mismo. Madrid: EDAF; 2021.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.