As Long as You Have More Good Days Than Bad, You'll Be Okay
As long as you have more good days than bad, you’ll be fine. Just take a deep breath – you’re okay. You’re managing those occasional bumps in the road that stress you out from time to time. That’s not to say it isn’t difficult and you might find yourself occasionally losing your grip for a few moments. However, over time you’ve learned to trust your own resources, and how to deal with those gray days. In fact, you can even cope with the occasional storms.
After so many experiences, you’ve undoubtedly discovered that the cliched messages of popular (not scientific) psychology aren’t particularly useful. For example, “If you want to, just do it” doesn’t always work, and the bad times don’t always leave you with valuable learning. In fact, sometimes they’re just that, bad times that you have to go through.
The most important thing to remember is that your suffering won’t last forever. Furthermore, every time an experience doesn’t destroy you or make you fall, your brain will process it as a victory. This inner perception will improve the vision you have of yourself. It’s time to admit that you’ve already overcome infinite battles, and here you are. Still standing.
Sometimes, the only way to deal with a bad day is to let it go. You don’t have to do anything at all.
As long as you have more good days than bad, you’ll be okay
As a human being, you have the socially ingrained habit to evaluate days as good or bad. It’s just the way we’re made. Every morning, you have a series of objectives you propose to carry out. However, if things don’t go as planned, you’ll probably label the day as disappointing, awful, or catastrophic.
That’s because you process your reality through your expectations and, when these aren’t met, you feel despondent and frustrated. This is explained by your unavoidable need to want to have everything under control. Nevertheless, in reality, life is defined by the chaotic and those ‘black swans’ that Nassim Taleb spoke about that symbolize the uncertain.
They’re those negative events that sometimes happen and that not even the most sensible mind would ever foresee or suspect. Indeed, nobody likes a bad day. That’s because we’re rarely prepared to deal with twists of fate, failures, mistakes, arguments, and losses. We think of good days as those when all the traffic lights we come up against are green.
But what can we do about the bad days?
Doing nothing is often the best option: accept and let go
The philosophical practice of Taoism extols a basic principle. This is the idea that doing nothing is often the best answer to life’s problems. Indeed, the Wu-Wei mindset is a calm, non-action mental approach. However, in a society that constantly urges you to push yourself and perform to the best of your ability, this perspective may seem contradictory.
Nevertheless, there are times when the most important thing is to slow down, calm your emotions, and understand that there are few things more useful than being calm. In fact, at the end of the day, as long as you have more good days than bad, everything will be okay. Dark and unpleasant moments are simply a part of life. Let them pass. Tomorrow’s another day.
In dark and stormy moments, love yourself more than ever
You must remember that many of your bad days aren’t down to external events, but to your own state of mind. You see and process reality as you feel it and you’re not always 100 percent right. Some days, everything is an effort, you don’t feel like doing anything, your motivation fails, and even your internal dialogue turns against you.
This is completely normal. Everyone has moments when the storm isn’t outside, but inside of them. So what can you do at these times?
Research conducted by the University of California claimed that self-compassion is key. Therefore, only when we speak to each other with respect and practice self-empathy, giving ourselves what we need, do we overcome those moments of discouragement more effectively.
Sometimes, nothing really ‘bad’ happens for you to consider a day as such. You just don’t feel good and everything looks grayer than usual. In these moments, you must love yourself more than ever.
Take advantage of the good days
Nowadays, life is so uncertain that you only really have one option. That’s to take advantage of the good days as much as you can. There’s no doubt that we live in increasingly restless times, but you mustn’t allow yourself to become overwhelmed or get carried away on a wave of uncertainty.
Fears and catastrophic thinking create tunnel vision. This means you just don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.
You have to accept that bad days exist, but they’re the exception rather than the rule. Furthermore, you have the tools to deal with them. They’re like a mental lifeboat that allows you to bravely face and adjust to difficult moments. They help you to eventually learn how to navigate around all your difficulties.
It’s essential to take advantage of the calm days. In fact, moments of light are always there for those who know how to look for them. Above all, for those who know how to encourage and beckon them into their lives.
Focus your mind on what has a solution and accept the rest
You were probably taught as a child that every problem has a solution. Perhaps that’s why you’ve always been obsessed with looking for ways out, options, resolutions, and strategies to solve challenges and face difficulties, whatever they may be. Nobody ever told you that, in reality, there are certain things that can’t be changed or improved.
Bad days are made up of crossroads that can’t be avoided and problems that have no solution. Accepting that there are things that you can’t control is the first rule of achieving well-being. Only in this way, will you continue to give greater meaning to your good moments, those that give you life, meaning, and even happiness.
All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.
- Breines JG, Chen S. Self-Compassion Increases Self-Improvement Motivation. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. 2012;38(9):1133-1143. doi:10.1177/0146167212445599
- Slingerland, Edward (2007). Effortless Action: Wu-wei As Conceptual Metaphor and Spiritual Ideal in Early China Oxford; New York: Oxford University Press. ISBN 9780195138993.