4 Ways to Retake Control of Your Life

4 Ways to Retake Control of Your Life

Last update: 20 March, 2016

Do you control your life, or does it control you? Do you often feel unsatisfied with your life? Do you often find yourself at the end of a day and wonder what you were doing all day? Sometimes it seems that life passes by and you don’t even realize it. This can leave you feeling like you are not doing what you should be doing, and like you are imprisoned by all of the obligations in your life.

Losing control of life is something that can happen unknowingly, and something you realize all of a sudden. One day you wake up and discover that the obligations you have are simply too much. The expectations that the rest of the world has of you are impossible to fulfill and you… well, you feel more lost than if you were to wake up and find yourself on the moon.

When you arrive at this point, it is likely that you feel like you cannot continue on. And in a certain sense, you are right. You cannot continue on the same path if you want it to lead to happiness. If you have decided to make a radical change and take control of your life, follow these tips and little by little you will rediscover yourself. 

1. Clearly identify what you want 

Desiring things is very common. On Monday, you may think that you want a new pair of shoes, but by the time Friday rolls around, you have forgotten about that. However, there are certain desires that are deeper than others. These are key in being able to take back control of your life. 

man and tree take

You have felt these desires for a long time, and although sometimes you have forgotten them because of the obligations of your daily life, you cannot avoid the fact that they come back to you every now and then. When they do come back to you, you should take advantage and create a plan to reach them. The path to achieving your goals consists of small decisions and steps that will bring you closer and closer to it.

Each day, give yourself a moment to do something that brings you a little closer to your goal. If you consider that the people around you will not help you in the process, you don’t even need to tell them you are doing it. But if you do believe that someone is there for you to help you, it is great to ask for help.

2. Invest in your dreams

It does not matter if you are a man or a women, you will know that you have lost control of your life when your money is destined to satisfy the needs of others. Of course, if you have children and a spouse, you should think about their needs, but if in the end you have no time nor money for your own hobby or to do what you enjoy, that is a sign that there may be a problem.

In no way are we suggesting that you should reject your obligations, but you should find a way to have something left for yourself. And this does not mean personal expenses like food or gas, but rather things like buying yourself a book you like, or anything that gives you some kind of healthy release and distraction.

If you want to take a sabbatical year, start to plan it and save for it now. You have to remember that the most important desires of your life are yours. A good way to take control of your life is by investing in your dreams and desires.

3. Analyze your relationships 

They say that a person becomes like the people with whom they spend time. If you feel like you have lost control of your life, take time to reflect on the people you spend time with and how they make you feel. Do they support you? Is their love and company determined by your actions and what you do for them, or would they be there regardless?

It is complicated and painful to accept that part of reason you’ve lost control of your life is because it’s been taken by others. However, if this is the case, the best thing to do is to recognize it and ask yourself if you are willing to continue living in this way.

people reaching for each other take

In the process of rediscovering yourself and taking back control of your life, it is possible that some of your relationships may change drastically or even come to an end. But don’t be afraid, part of personal growth implies letting go of certain things and certain people. 

4. Prepare yourself to take steps forward

One of the greatest challenges when trying to take control of your life is adopting the changes that are necessary, and avoiding taking steps backwards. You should be prepared for moments of tension, fear, and obstacles. All of this will appear in some moment when you decide to rediscover who you truly are and take real and daring chances.

Don’t let yourself feel small when facing your desires and decisions. If you need to, give yourself time to reconsider your decisions and think twice. But don’t change them just because you feel some external pressure to do so.

Remember that the most difficult moment will be when you are just beginning to open that door to freedom. Once you have it open, you will feel happy, uplifted, and freed from your tension and your fears.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.