The Demons from Our Childhood
Childhood is the most important stage in life in terms of internalizing values, lessons and behaviors. Many psychologists that specialize in the study of the childhood and infant stages stress the importance of a gradual maturing and the act of overcoming different stages in a satisfactory way in order to not become stuck in any of them.
If we had to point out the people who most influenced a child, these would have to be its parents or main guardian. The majority of parents and guardians love us, want the best for us and know that raising a child is a difficult task. However, wanting is not always the same as doing.
Childhood experiences affect us in adulthood
Not all parenthood takes place within an ideal context. There may be an imbalance in the distribution of chores, a lack of emotional maturity, a crisis in the relationship itself. Or this new responsibility can simply turn out to be too much or too difficult for some people.
In this article we’re not going to judge, nor do we want anyone to think we are. But there’s no doubt, some upbringings have negatively impacted the lives of some children that today are now adults. We’re going to name some of these practices and associate them to behaviors that can emerge in adulthood. Because sometimes knowledge and introspection is the best weapon we can have against our demons.
Parental attitudes that inhibit their children during childhood
In many cases, our experiences during childhood are determining factors for our adult lives. There are a series of attitudes that some parents have towards their children that disable them from living fully in the future:
- Overprotection: Parents always want to prevent bad things from happening to their children, and they believe that inhibiting their freedom is the key. Their fear is so intense that they need to keep them controlled, in a “safe zone.” The consequences that may arise are shyness, lack of initiative, pathological doubt when beginning any individual activity and a continuous search for approval.
“Childhood has its own way of seeing, thinking and feeling. There’s nothing less wise than trying to substitute them for our own.”