Do You Know the 3 Types of Self-Esteem?

· November 23, 2015

Self-esteem is a very important factor if you want to maintain your well being. What’s more, self-esteem will be vital when forming positive, healthy relationships with those around us. Yet despite this, not all of us have the same self-esteem.

“We all know that self-esteem comes from what you think of you, not what other people think of you”

-Gloria Gaynor-

There are three types of self-esteem. This does not mean that we can label ourselves with one single type of self-esteem, but rather, we know that sometimes we feel more exuberant and other times more depressive. It all depends on what is happening our lives.

But you can know which type of self-esteem predominates in you. Which is the one that surfaces most often?

1. Inflated self-esteem

People with inflated self-esteem think they are better than others and have no doubts about underestimating everyone else. This is a very negative self-esteem, as it holds them back from establishing affectionate and healthy relationships. Their competitiveness is always present and they always want to come out on top. For these people, happiness is found in achieving success, but the reality of the matter is that they do not attain happiness with this attitude.

People with inflated self-esteem are characterized by their inability to listen to others and to critique themselves. They are not capable of correcting their own errors and, as such, they are constantly blaming others. Furthermore, they tend to undervalue others, adopting hostile behaviors towards them.


It is very difficult for these people to establish healthy relationships with others. They always see everyone else as competition.

Apple Looking in the Mirror

2. High self-esteem

People with this type of self-esteem accept and value themselves. It is a self-esteem that is known to be positive, as it manages to make the person satisfied with their life. Does this imply that there will not be barriers or walls to be scaled? Absolutely not, but the confidence in oneself and the courage to face any problems that may arise make everything much easier.

“Persons of high self-esteem are not driven to make themselves superior to others; they do not seek to prove their value by measuring themselves against a comparative standard. Their joy is being who they are, not in being better than someone else”
-Nathaniel Branden-

Believing in yourself and trusting in who you are is what characterizes people who possess this type of self-esteem. However, this does not make them arrogant, nor do they feel better than anyone else. The just have the security necessary to avoid letting negative circumstances and events throw them off balance.

Girl Looking in Mirror

But even among those with high self-esteem, there are people who can indeed be seen off-balance. That is to say, they are not able to constantly maintain this high self-esteem.

What characterizes these people who give in to insecurity? The aggressive, passive, or negative attitude to accept other points of view. This particularly happens in competitive contexts when their insecurity becomes something that they absolutely cannot face.

3. Low self-esteem

People who have low self-esteem are the opposite of those with high self-esteem. They do not value themselves, they do not trust in their possibilities, and insecurity that they may be feeling is carried over into almost every situation. Fear of failure is something that torments them and holds people with low self-esteem back. They are the model of unhappy people.

“Needing to talk badly about others indicates low self-esteem. That means, ‘I feel so low that instead of picking myself up, I have to cut others down’”
-Pope Francis-

People with low self-esteem have moments of euphoria when everything is going right for them, but when things start to go bad, their self-esteem drops very quickly. They are sensitive people who are easily influenced and who tend to show their opinion, but without defending it.

There are some people who have low self-esteem that are not as unstable; their problem, rather, is indecision. They have very little trust in themselves, they undervalue themselves, and they have such a great fear of messing up that they constantly believe that they do not measure up to the circumstances.

What type of self-esteem is the most common for you?

Keep in mind that it is difficult to escape from inflated or low self-esteem, but if you are among the people who have high self-esteem, even if you occasionally give in to the instability of certain situations, congratulations! You are much closer to achieving the happiness and satisfaction in life that will make you feel blessed.