Focus on What You Like, Forget What You Don't

Focus on What You Like, Forget What You Don't

Last update: 02 February, 2016

We often complain too much about the things we don’t like and fantasize about how we would like things to have happened.  Without realizing it, most of us focus our attention on what displeases us or what we’d like to change. Our field of vision and attention become a detector of negatives things.

This dress looks so bad on me! I shouldn’t have gotten a haircut. Maybe if I hadn’t made that comment they would have picked me! I don’t like this food. What a day I’ve had! Only bad things happen to me. I’m so bored! They don’t count on me…

But, what about the good things, the ones we like and leave a sweet taste in our mouth? It seems we forget about them more easily.

If we really take a good look, there are a of good things in the details of our day to day. They’re there, in plain sight, though we’re too clouded by our negativity to see them.

Have you ever tried to focus on what you like?

lady floating with balloons

I urge you to do just that, and stop whining and complaining so much. It really does no good, even less if we repeat it so often. One time is enough if you decide to change it and put plans in motion to do so. If not, the other option is to accept it and move on.

Though one way or the other, today I propose something different to you: Just for one day, focus on what you like, love, and makes you smile.

And no, don’t tell me there’s nothing out there. Or that your life is boring, or that you’re stuck in a rut. Because even in a rut, there are incredible gestures, feelings, situations and fascinating people. You just have to prove it.

Fool your mind and start to utilize a different strategy. Focus on what you like, love, and moves and fascinates you.

You can apply this to any aspect of your life, such as with work, your romantic relationship, your relationships with your kids or friends. And above all, please, apply it with yourself.

watercolor drawing of woman

At first it will be hard for you. It’s normal after so many years with the preference of dwelling on what you don’t like. Dwelling on the mistakes or failures. Your mind will want to guide you towards what youre used to. But it’s a matter of time, effort and desire.

Besides, you’ll also get to know yourself a little bit better. Has it ever happened, that you didn’t even know exactly what you liked, but you did know perfectly well what you didn’t like? Well, dare to find out!

Focusing on the things you don’t like for so long will only diminish your self-esteem and make you lose confidence and interest in other people. And it can even diminish your desire to live or make you lose your life’s meaning.

In the end you’ll end up believing it so much, that there will be nothing left in your surroundings. In other words, you won’t focus on anything else, though you’re surrounded by pleasant things.

Therefore, what do you like about yourself? What do you like about others? What do you like about life? What do you like about your relationship?

Surprise yourself by focusing on the things you like and bring a smile to your face.

Once you find them, start to promote them, to believe in them. Start to focus your attention on them when they occur in your daily life.

Because you’ll gain a lot more by promoting the things you love, than by attacking the things you don’t. If you don’t agree, try it out!

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.