Emotional Reconstruction: Taking Steps Towards Well-Being

29 June, 2020
Emotional reconstruction is the art of doing something to “rescue yourself” when you feel you're at a dead end.
 

At some point in your life, you probably felt that you were walking into the unknown. These are times of extreme sadness where you can see no light at the end of the tunnel and no way out. During these times, you need emotional reconstruction.

Emotionally rebuilding yourself means regaining security and starting to move forward again, albeit with small cautious steps. The idea is to reduce risks and look for places of safety, forming a foundation that you can build on and re-emerge from.

Emotional reconstruction is an arduous task; it’ll take up a great deal of the resources you have left. However, it’ll be a worthwhile investment. In this article, give you some strategies that may prove helpful.

Emotional reconstruction: getting to know yourself better

An emotional reconstruction consists of designing and working on a new foundation for your life. In this sense, you need to transform or prune everything that was hurting you.

To begin this process, you need to analyze what’s happened in your life. Find somewhere to sit down and analyze recent events in order to put yourself in the best possible position to change.

This allows you to analyze your victories and failures. Nevertheless, you should know that it’s a gradual process. As you identify and become aware of things in your life, you get to know yourself better. Then, you’ll get insight into what you may have to do.

A woman with closed eyes.
 

Emotional reconstruction, the art of being assertive

Assertiveness is an art. It’s about showing what’s really happening to you, even when the situation is difficult. In many cases, it isn’t easy to say no to a loved one or a boss, even if you’re only defending your rights by doing so.

Why do you need assertiveness to carry out emotional reconstruction? Simply because it opens up an area in which you can see yourself as an autonomous and capable person with rights, obligations, and responsibilities. This way, you can recover that sense of control that your feelings of defenselessness affected.

I love and rebuild myself

Another step in emotional reconstruction is self-esteem. Self-esteem is the evaluation of your own worth.

Why is it so important in emotional reconstruction? Because people are more likely to take care of those who take care of them (this generates positive feelings). Thus, if you look after yourself, it’s more likely that you’ll want to look after those who are looking after you.

What we mean is that you’ll want to take care of yourself! Although it may sound a bit complex, if you read it again, you’ll see that it isn’t. It’s just a circular effect!

Embrace change

All emotional reconstruction involves making both internal and external changes. In this regard, some authors identify two types of change. In fact, Paul Watzlawick, one of the main authors on human communication theory, described them in his book Change: Principles of Problem Formation and Problem Resolution.

 

He talked about the relationship between the individual and the system, especially in situations where people feel there’s no way out. These are the two types of change:

  • Change 1. Making modifications in order to return to a pre-crisis state.
  • Change 2. The changes that place you in a different situation than at the beginning of the crisis. Here, we’re talking of transformation.

We all learn from changes, no matter what time. In fact, it isn’t always possible or easy to achieve a type 2 change. Thus, returning to a position of balance through a type 1 change can also help.

A woman and a sunset.

The benefits of emotional reconstruction

Emotional reconstruction has many benefits, such as:

  • Increased quality of life.
  • Healthier relationships.
  • A better relationship with yourself.
  • Increased self-knowledge.
  • Higher self-esteem.
  • Better emotional management.
  • Less suffering.
  • Increased assertiveness.

Emotional reconstruction largely depends on your will and your decisions. However, ultimately, other people’s help may also tip the balance. Furthermore, you can always ask for professional help to support you in shaping this emotional reconstruction.

 

In short, we’d like to tell you that emotional reconstruction is an adventure. You don’t have to feel bad if you need to do it, as it usually yields very good results during emotionally positive times. The reason behind this is that you’ll have a lot more energy and you usually won’t need to make so many changes.

Watzlawick, P, Fisch, R., & Weakland, J. H. (2003). Cambio. Barcelona, España: Herder.