Are You Afraid of Living?

If you're afraid to live, you'll never realize any of your dreams.

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Gema Sánchez Cuevas.

Written by Yamila Papa

Last update: 21 December, 2022

Being afraid of living is something that’s quite frequent yet, at the same time, often hidden. If you suffer from it, you’ll experience really deep feelings that are difficult to eradicate. In fact, fear will play a leading role in your life.

You’ll stop having hopes and dreams. In reality, this means you’ll effectively stop living your life. You won’t try to achieve more goals and won’t pursue your dreams. Indeed, you’ll hardly do anything out of the ordinary at all.

The fear of moving forward

Being afraid of living means you’re stuck in one place. You don’t take any steps forward and don’t take any risks for anything or anyone. This is due to the fear that making decisions produces in you.

Being afraid of living is also synonymous with letting yourself get collectively carried along by the crowd. You avoid having any different thoughts to avoid ‘not fitting in’.

Being afraid of living completely limits you. It’s like looking at the outside world from a window in your house. However, you never actually leave that house. You never play, walk, love, talk, smile, etc. You just stay on that passive plane where there’s no room for action, laughter, movement, or making decisions.

Nevertheless, really living consists of achieving your dreams. Of course, they change throughout your life, but there are always goals to be met, even if you don’t believe they exist.

You must take risks in this very short existence that we, as human beings have. Escape from those walls and bars that you’ve imposed on yourself for whatever reason and dedicate yourself to being happy. At the very least, look for the little moments of happiness and enjoyment.

Wanting to move on

Desire allows you to continue. It’s the engine that drives you. Wishing is the same as having hope, objectives, goals, and dreams.

When you fight for what you want, you’re not limited by fear. No obstacle can defeat you. You use your fears as an impulse to move forward and overcome even the impossible.

When you remain static, standing still, without taking one new step forward because you’re afraid of the consequences or of being wrong, you become stagnant. Not only do you not advance, but you also stop others from doing so.

There’s no emotion more intense than the one you feel when you’ve achieved something after a great effort. There’s no greater relief at bedtime than knowing you’ve worked hard enough during the day to achieve your goal.

You won’t ever find a greater pleasure than being able to say that you made your dreams come true. Or that you did this through your own sacrifice, courage, and determination. Because nobody gives you anything for free. Furthermore, if that were the case, it wouldn’t feel the same.

Living without fear

Living without fear means really living. To achieve this, you need to change your attitude toward your life. Ask yourself where your feelings of fear began, where they originated. Understand what it is that’s led you to where you are today. In other words, not really living.

It might’ve been that you were raised in an extremely strict family. Or, maybe you’ve experienced a huge disappointment in your love or professional life. A betrayal, a death, a trauma, a serious mistake, all of these experiences can paralyze you.

However, it’s not a sufficient excuse to let the days go by without doing something different. Work on it, go to therapy if necessary, talk to whoever’s right for you, but don’t just let yourself be.

Immerse yourself in your memories and what’s happening in your heart. Externalize what’s happening to you. If you don’t feel better speaking to someone else, stand in front of a mirror and talk to yourself.