81 Questions to Get to Know Your Friends Better

Do you think you know everything about your friends? Probably not. These questions will allow you to discover details, nuances and curiosities that you did not know about them and have a good time.
81 Questions to Get to Know Your Friends Better
Valeria Sabater

Written and verified by the psychologist Valeria Sabater.

Last update: 19 September, 2023

In the following article, we’ll suggest a series of questions to get to know your friends better. You may think that you know them well or even think that you’re soul mates and that there’s nothing you don’t know about one another. However, as surprising as it may be, there are always small and important aspects that we’re unaware of.

Seneca said that the best thing in a friendship is to understand and be understood. However, we can always go a little further and add the pleasure of discovering more. The goal isn’t to set up an interrogation, but this series of questions can allow us to have a fun time and delve into surprising and curious nuances.

Gather your best friends and explore, pose, propose, and launch each question without fear or reluctance. You’ll surely have an entertaining time that will allow you to further strengthen the bond of complicity, affection, and camaraderie that defines you.

Friends putting their hands together.

Questions to get to know your friends better

There are many things that unite you with your friends, including hobbies, values, the same life experiences, and the magic by which the world seems to calm down and make sense when you’re together. However, it’s worth creating new situations to discover yourselves, challenge each other, and thus have a broader vision of yourselves.

These questions will allow you to get to know your friends better. Don’t hesitate to answer the questions in a round to make the experience even more fun.

1. What caught your attention about me when you met me?

Let’s start with a question that’s relevant to your friendship. Remind your friend what it was about them that caught your attention. Surely, they’ll tell you something unexpected that will surely surprise you.

2. What do you like least about the way you are or your personality?

We all have some nuance of our personality that we don’t like and that we always try to change or improve. Surely, your friends also have some particularity about themselves that’s not entirely comfortable for them.

3. When did you first fall in love?

Childhood loves are always good topics of conversation. If you haven’t touched on this topic yet, it’s time to do it. These are issues that we always like to remember and even share.

4. Tell me about an uncomfortable moment in your life

Let’s face it: We all have not one but several unpleasant moments that we don’t like to talk about too much. It’s time to make use of our trust and share it.

5. When was the last time you cried, and why?

It’s very possible that, as friends, you already know the answer. However, it’s always good to bring up the subject because, sometimes, you can discover something that you didn’t know.

6. If you could get a tattoo right now, which one would you choose?

It doesn’t matter if your friend is one of those people who already have their skin almost completely tattooed or, on the contrary, that they belong to that group of those who don’t have a single tattoo. Tattoos are an expression of our specific tastes or needs. The answer will surely surprise you.

7. What’s the most outrageous lie you have told?

There are sophisticated lies, mediocre lies, and preposterous falsehoods that, at some point or another, we end up saying, whether willingly or unintentionally. Feel free to ask your friends this question.

8. What do you usually do to relieve stress?

Everyone handles stress in their own way and it’s always nice to know how our friends do.

9. What do you wish never to have to do again in life?

Each of us has experienced situations that we would never repeat again. But that’s what life and experience are for–Knowing where you never want to be again.

10. Explain your last dream to me

Let’s delve into dreamland. Among those questions to get to know your friends more, it’s always good to delve into the world of dreams to have a broader vision of them.

11. Have you ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn’t have?

This can be, perhaps, an awkward question . However, it can also be interesting to know if our friends have been attracted to or have fallen in love with people who could bring them more trouble than happiness.

12. Tell me three decisive musical groups in your life

Music is always a good channel and artistic expression with which to get to know a person better. If you haven’t talked about this topic yet, now is the time to do so.

13. Explain to me one of the happiest moments of your childhood

It’s always comforting to share those happy moments from our past, and especially from our childhood.

14. What’s the personality trait that you least like in people?

Living among people with the most varied personalities, behaviors, and hobbies can often be complicated. However, we all feel that there are aspects that we can’t tolerate or bear, such as narcissism , lying, competitiveness, victimhood, etc. This can be a good topic of conversation.

15. What would an ideal world look like, according to you?

Among all those questions to get to know your friends better, this may be one of the most interesting. It makes it easier for us to delve into moral, philosophical, social, and even psychological aspects. Let’s not hesitate to ask this question.

16. What do you value most in a friendship?

Talk about friendship with your friends . Surely, you’ll discover important details to take better care of your relationship or to value what you’ve already built.

17. What are your favorite television series?

If you still don’t know which series have marked the lives of your friends, it’s time to find out.

18. What’s the first book you remember that fascinated you?

We all have a book that marked our life. Sharing, talking, and delving into those first readings that marked us forever will create good conversation topics with our friends.

19. Questions to get to know your friends better. What is it that scares you the most?

Talking about our fears reveals us as people and, in turn, makes it easier to create a good connection with someone. When we expose our fears, we allow ourselves to voice our intimacies out loud with someone special.

20. What do you think you’re very bad at

Perhaps you have a hard time with mathematics, you don’t get along with children, or you’re constantly failing at romantic relationships. Why not spend some time talking about these frustrations with your friends?

Three friends adult men going on a road trip.

21. Who has been your biggest influence in life?

Among the questions to get to know your friends better, it’s always good to know who they have (or had) as role models in their lives.

22. What’s the hardest lesson you have had to learn in life?

Don’t be afraid to touch on sensitive topics to get to know your friends better. Friendship and trust allow us to cross more intimate thresholds, such as talking about the hardest lessons we’ve learned in life.

23. Do you think your younger self would be proud of where you are right now in life?

Invite your friends to do a little retrospection to assess how their lives have gone so far.

24. Do you have any strange pet peeves that I don’t know about?

Sometimes, even our best friends are unaware of those little things that get under our skin. You’d be surprised what can bug people!

25. Right now, what’s at the top of your bucket list?

Dreams, desires, projects, vital needs… We all have deep desires that we need to satisfy.

26. Are you afraid of getting old?

The passage of time is something that each person handles and understands in a particular way. Therefore, among the questions you can ask to get to know your friends better, this may be one of the most interesting.

27. What does being successful in life look like to you?

Each of us conceives what it means to succeed in this world differently. There will be those who have higher aspirations and those who have a more humble and simple heart and outlook.

28. How do you see yourself in 10 years?

Let’s look to the future. Surely, this question will be the engine of very interesting conversations with your friends.

29. What usually keeps you awake at night?

Loves, worries, having eaten too much, or anxiety. Knowing what keeps your special friend or friends from getting enough rest is a way to get to know them better.

30. What animal do you identify with?

Wild wolves, whales that conquer the ocean, or dragonflies that move through the sky, the water, or the wind. Among the questions to get to know our friends better, this may be one of the most interesting.

31. Do you have -or have you had- any platonic love?

Platonic loves are unfortunate, but who hasn’t had one?

32. If you knew the world was going to end tomorrow, what would you do?

Pose an apocalyptic question and enjoy the occurrences of your friends in the face of this possibility.

33. If you had the opportunity to be immortal, how would you take advantage of it?

Immortality can be a gift or a curse. However, it’s something that we’ve all considered at some point.

34. When have you been most proud of yourself?

Give your friends the opportunity to talk about those luminous moments when they reached, did, or achieved something they’re proud of.

35. Have you ever given up on any of your dreams? If so, for what reason?

Giving up always marks our lives. Talk about this topic to get to know your friends a little better.

36. If you were a superhero, what powers would you have?

We all dream of having extraordinary abilities, but as they say, with all power comes great responsibility. What capabilities do your best friends dream of having?

37. What do you think of polyamory?

Polyamory or open relationships always arouse interest and controversy. This question can’t be lacking among the questions to get to know your friends better.

38. If you could share a dinner with four people, living or dead, who would they be?

Actors, writers, musicians, scientists, loved ones, etc… We all have figures that we admire with whom we would love to share a meal. Don’t hesitate to share this interesting question.

39. Are you a “glass half full” or “glass half empty” kind of person?

Are your friends the ones who always see things from a bright and optimistic side, or are they, perhaps, those who are rather cautious and even pessimistic?

40. Do you consider yourself a mature, serious, and adult person, or do you think that your childish side continues to dominate you?

We all have that friend with that refreshing, innocent, and irresistible childlike spark. Likewise, we all have friends who are always serious, logical, and responsible, and keep us grounded. Now, does what we see coincide with how they see themselves?

41. Which person do you think knows you best?

Among the questions to get to know your friends better, it’s always interesting to ask this question. Who do they think knows perfectly their intimacies and the details about who they are? Maybe it’s you.

42. Would you rather be a millionaire or find the love of your life?

We all know how hard it is to find the ideal partner, that authentic love with whom to start a happy project. However, what if your best friend prefers being a millionaire to finding love? Don’t hesitate to ask them.

43. What’s your favorite word?

We all have a word in some language that we love because of its meaning or its sound.

44. Do you remember the moment when you laughed the most in your life?

Happy moments, moments in which you laugh until your belly hurts. We’ve all experienced moments like this, and it’s worth giving your friends the opportunity to tell you what those moments in their lives were like.

A man and a woman talking and laughing while sitting on the beach at sunset.

45. Questions to get to know your friends better: If your life were a movie, what would it be?

Life is Beautiful, Mission Impossible, Titanic, Lost Highway, Wonder WomanThere’s always a movie that describes a part of our lives. Don’t hesitate to ask your friends what theirs is.

46. What’s your most prized possession?

We all have special objects that have marked our lives. Surely, your friends can tell you extraordinary and interesting stories about those beloved possessions.

47. If you had to be reborn again, who or what would you choose to be?

Reincarnate, be reborn… It’s always interesting to touch on these topics at a gathering among friends.

48. When was the last time you felt envy, and why?

Envy is a very common emotion. However, it’s difficult for us to talk about it and about those situations that arouse it in us. Talking about this will allow you to get to know your friends better.

49. What is your favorite work of art?

We all have that painting, sculpture, or monument that fascinates us and that we don’t hesitate to talk about with our friends.

50. What makes your day immediately better?

For many, music, a cup of coffee, a cup of tea, a walk with a dog, or a hug from the person we love is all we need to feel better. Among the questions to get to know your friends better, this is one of the most interesting.

51. What would be the perfect trip for you?

Talk about perfect travel plans, about that idyllic country where you’d like to spend some time.

52. Finish the sentence: At this point in life, what I long to experience is…

Ask your friends to say the first thing that comes to mind.

53. What is infidelity for you?

Infidelity is a touchy subject, but not everyone has the same opinion about it. There are people who have a liberal view of relationships and others who have a more conventional mindset.

54. Questions to get to know your friends more. Would you forgive an infidelity?

Another of the topics that always lead to the most interesting conversations has to do with partner infidelity. Don’t hesitate to ask your friends what they think about the topic.

55. What’s the next thing you want to learn (language, sport, computer program, etc.)?

Surely, your friends are active people who are always learning new things.

56. According to you, what lies beyond death?

We all have our own conceptions, theories, or beliefs about what happens when we die. Don’t hesitate to ask the opinion of your best friends.

57. What is it that makes you feel really alive?

A passion, a goal, the people around us… There are many things that give meaning to our existence and give life a boost. Feel free to ask your friends this question.

58. What are you most grateful for?

Get a little more transcendent and raise this interesting question. What are your friends most grateful for in their lives?

59. According to you, what do I appreciate the most about you as a friend?

It never hurts to ask this question out loud. Making your friends try to understand why we love them, admire them, and consider them precious treasures is always worth it. Don’t hesitate to help them see what you value about them…

60. What would you like to achieve in this life?

This is another question that provides information about the person’s expectations and concerns for the future.

61. Are you a superstitious person?

How does your friend perceive reality? This question helps you find out.

62. If you had to be on a reality show, what would it have to be about?

Not everyone is in favor of reality TV. This is a way to know what your friends think about it.

63. In what situations would you be willing to lie?

We’ve all lied at some point–it’s normal in human beings. Surely, when asked this question, we all want to show a positive image of ourselves. But perhaps your friend will be completely honest.

64. Where would you go to relax for a few days?

This is a way to know how a person chooses to calm down and disconnect. Some may enjoy surfing somewhere off the beaten path, while others may prefer a day at the spa.

65. What things have you made a habit of in your daily life?

Positive things, of course. Habits make us who we are, so they define our personality.

66. What do you think about happiness?

Happiness is, for many, the greatest achievement in life. If you know what makes your friends happy, you can mediate to recreate situations that make them happy.

67. What do you think a perfect day would be like?

As our tastes and ideas about perfection are different, the way we classify a day as perfect is also different.

68. What do you regret the most?

The same can happen with the most unpleasant moments in life. It’s good to invite your friends to open their hearts to you and tell you about it.

69. What’s your greatest frustration in life?

This is a way to look back and make an assessment of failures and unachieved goals.

70. Who do you admire the most in this world?

We all have role models.; people we see as examples of life because of what they’ve achieved, what they represent, or their ideas. If you really want to get closer to your friends, you have to know who that person is for them.

71. How do you deal with anxiety?

Everyone has their tricks to try to manage anxiety, whether they work or not.

72. What are the three most important values in life for you?

Values are ideas that summarize a person’s ethics, and this question helps explore them.

73. What is your favorite series and movie?

The rise of streaming entertainment services has meant that we all have a favorite series and movie. You can make an open list in which you both include the best titles.

74. What do you think is the adjective that best defines you?

This is a way to summarize your personality in a minimalist way.

75. What would a society governed by you be like?

This question also helps you understand your friend’s values and scale of ethics.

76. What is your biggest irrational fear?

Almost all people develop a fear of something relatively harmless without being able to explain very well why.

77. If money wasn’t an issue, what would you buy?

The first thing your friend mentions is their true wish. Posing hypothetical scenarios of this type allows you to get to know an aspect that you didn’t know about them.

78. How do you value the relationship with your parents?

With this question, you’ll be able to know what they really think of them and how prosperous their relationship is right now.

79. What do you hate most in life?

That which makes them feel most uncomfortable, or that arouses negative feelings in them. These don’t have to be transcendental things; small things are also valid. For example, being stuck behind someone who’s walking very slowly, doing the dishes, etc.

80. Do you think you have your life figured out?

Most likely, the answer is no, so try to find out why. No matter how stable someone’s life is, it’s impossible to be 100% satisfied with it.

81. How would you like to be remembered when you’re gone?

This is one of the deepest questions when it comes to getting to know someone because it deals with the imprint that they want to leave on others in the long term.

You can complete this round of questions with others that come to mind and invite your friends to think of their own questions. Without a doubt, the conversation will bring you even closer together.


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This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.