Which Enneagram Personality Type are You?
A few months ago, in my work as a life coach, I discovered the word “enneagram.” As soon as I heard it I became immensely curious and I started researching what it was about and how it worked.
The word comes from Greek, and means nine lines and it is used to describe the nine different types of personalities we all fundamentally fall into.
You could say that the enneagram is a system that helps us understand an objective reality through subjective means. It also can help us determine and better understand:
- What makes us who we are, and act or think the way that we do.
- Our main character trains: our shortcomings and strengths.
- Our desires and our fears.
- And the most fascinating of all: it helps us discover why we always struggle with the same things.
I have compiled a list of the 9 types that the enneagram is based on so you can find out for yourselves which one fits you. Hopefully it will give you some clues that can help you in your path towards personal development.
What are the 9 enneatypes?
This type refers to people who want to be perfect, because they hate feeling imperfect. Because of this complex, they unconsciously create an ideal of how they should be. They have a very self-demanding and self-critical personality.
Obviously, if they are always searching for perfection, they can become irritated and frustrated very quickly. And since their desired perfection is unattainable, they also tend to get angry easily.
Their overbearing manner leads them to believe that they are always right and their truth is the only truth. To unlock and learn, they must first convert their anger into peace of mind and accept themselves as they are.
When we do not love ourselves we fervently seek and need love. This need characterizes the second enneatype, which includes people who think that loving yourself is selfish. Instead, they prioritize the needs of others over their own and feel happier the more they give love to those around them.
The bad part? By worrying about everyone else, they forget about themselves and their own hearts, and so they tend to be dependent people who hate solitude. They have a tendency towards pride and think they know bests what everyone else needs, so they give advice constantly and then throw it in others’ faces that they do so much for them.
In order to evolve inwardly they need to transform their pride into humility and care for their own emotional needs first.
They do not value themselves and because of this need the constant approval of others. If they do not stand out somehow, they do not feel validated or loved. They see their role as a human being as consisting of professional triumphs, personal image, success and recognition.
What does all of this do for them? It makes them hide behind a mask and forget who they really are. They are presumptuous, ambitious, competitive people. Their personal evolution requires that they transform their vanity into authenticity and value themselves for who they are instead of what they have or what people think of them.
These people need constant attention from those around them, and constantly need to feel as if they are being “discovered.” They feel very inferior to others, which leads them to need to feel unique, special, and different. When comparing themselves with others, they always think that they are lacking “something” to be happy, and are filled with envy, sadness, and melancholy.
They are self-centered and therefore speak too much of their own feelings without taking into consideration the feelings of others. An important characteristic of enneatype 4 is that they tend to feel misunderstood and go through many ups and downs. To develop, they need to learn to care more for others instead of always focusing on themselves.
These are people who are afraid to express their feelings and relate with others emotionally. Physical contact makes them uncomfortable, so they are often cold, reserved, and distant. They feel secure in their own rational, theoretical, intellectual world even without being able to use that knowledge to take action.
To learn and grow as human beings they need to be aware of and connect more with their heart and find a balance between what they think and what they feel.
This type is characterized by people who do not have confidence in themselves and are afraid to make decisions. They live continuously in a state of alertness, with fear of future situations and commitments. They worry excessively and usually ask other people what they should be doing with their lives.
To evolve internally, this type needs to transform their cowardice into courage, learning to have confidence in themselves and taking responsibility for the decisions they make.
Do you know someone who fears the pain they have inside? Then you know an enneatype 7 personality: fun, happy, positive people who use humor as a shield of defense to avoid pain.
A principal feature of this personality is a tendency to be hyperactive, constantly seeking pleasure and always doing any activity as to not become bored or dissatisfied with themselves. It costs them drastically in terms of their ability to be present and focus.
To overcome this and develop, they need to cultivate silence and the art of doing nothing, and to connect with the happiness and wellbeing that lie inside as opposed to trying to escape.
Are you afraid of getting hurt? We all are, but a person with a type 8 personality fears it too much. They construct a wall and live life defensively so that they have the option of being in control by acting aggressively when they feel threatened.
They always need to be in control of situations without having to endure someone else telling them what to do. Their life motto is probably “the best defense is a good offense.”
To grow, they need to let go and accept their own vulnerability, understanding that no one can hurt them emotionally if they do not first open up and give consent.
They avoid conflict at any cost because they do not know how to manage the anger of others. They generally go unnoticed in order to avoid conflict and it takes a lot for them to say “no” for fear that it will anger someone.
They tend to be good listeners, believing that their opinion does not matter and letting themselves be carried away by others. This leads them to lack motivation to engage in activities or create better situations for themselves. They need to change their laziness into proactivity, assert themselves, and add value to the world.
Which enneatype do you identify most with? Knowing which is your type will help you overcome major barriers and obstacles in your day to day life and thus help you improve yourself as a human being.