What Makes for a Happier Life, Stability or Change?

· November 8, 2015

How would you define yourself? As a person with wings? Or maybe as someone with roots? Often times, it’s not easy to decide between one or another, between stability and change. Life isn’t black and white. Our existence is painted in gray scales. It’s filled with tiny circumstances that lead us from one path to another.

Sometimes, we feel the indefinable wish to extend our wings and escape from the life we lead now. Escape from what currently surrounds us. We can’t always do it, because we all have roots — some deeper than others — that keep us from leaving our lives all together. That kind of change demands a lot of determination, and that’s not an easy thing to find.

What’s better then? Stability or change?

The truth is, there is no right answer to that question. The truth is the only thing that’s real is “circumstances.” Vital moments in which we must choose whether to drop anchor or set off to new lands. Decisive moments where we need to draw our courage.

A life of change or stability

Some people can’t stand staying still. They are always looking over their shoulder at the wide open horizon. They feel that they have to go further on their search for new purposes, for new dreams to fulfill in order to fill their hungry hearts. Their hearts are rarely satisfied.


These people simply don’t fit into routines. They rebel and advance on their own journeys leaving people, memories, joys and also sadness behind. A life with wings doesn’t always offer true happiness. But it does produce plenty of opportunities to search for your true essence.

And what about people with roots? Sometimes they are described as conformists. As the type of personality that seeks stability, because it’s synonymous with security and belonging. A place without changes, where you don’t have to face unexpected or new things. A place of serene calmness where you can build a life by your own values.

So, who would be happier? He who always takes flight? Or he who feels the need to dig his roots even deeper? Taken to extremes, neither is ideal. It’s precisely in the balance of these two dimensions that life’s true meaning lies. People who only seek change and movement may never find peace. Their existence will always be filled with questions that rarely find answers.

On the other hand, people who feel the need for stability and security may settle for a life of suffering simply because they fear change. They might fall into the trap of thinking it’s better to be quiet and not ask questions in order to not discover that there are other possibilities. Other options that could maybe make them happier.

yoga pose with feathers

Finding the balance

As they say: “It’s hard to fall in love with someone with wings. But, it’s also hard to rip out someone’s roots.”

What’s really worthwhile in life is letting yourself feel and experience things with wisdom and maturity. Understanding that life involves a series of continuous changes. We need to be capable of facing all of the restless tides of life. Sometimes they’ll bring good things, and sometimes not so much.

The important thing is to allow yourself to feel each experience. When you feel happiness, plant your roots so it will last as long as possible and wont escape your grasp. Be brave and accept the challenge of stability and belonging.

However, if later on you find that happiness is being tarnished by suffering, accept that reality with courage and take flight with maturity and integrity.

Your happiness is always the essential thing in life. And a healthy life needs both wings and roots. The key is in the balance, in this simple wisdom.