The Past Has No Power to Stain Your Present

The Past Has No Power to Stain Your Present

Last update: 11 March, 2017

The past does not exist in reality, it only it exists in our minds and in our memories. If we remember it consciously it will affect our emotions, either in a good way or a bad way. Of course, it will affect me one way or another depending on how I assess, evaluate or give meaning to this past.

How many times do we tend to blame the past for how we feel now! This lack of emotional responsibility is extremely treacherous because it does not let us take charge of our present and we are stuck in a reality that no longer exists and that we, unfortunately, cannot change.

It’s like beating your head against the wall. The more we demand that our past should have been another way, the more it hurts.

Change the prism: accepting the past

Everyone chooses and decides whether they want to be miserable for the rest of their lives or, on the contrary, if they prefer to take advantage of the time they have left and enjoy life. This is nothing more than a personal choice made in the present, that has nothing to do with whatever affected us in the past.

Haven’t you noticed that every person has a vision of reality that is totally different? We can easily see cases of people who have had bad things happen to them, but who have chosen to enjoy life and their present. However, in the same situation, others decide to stay in a position of being victims all their lives, are isolated, angry with their bad luck and cannot concentrate on anything other than their past.

binoculars to observe the sea

The difference between these people is obviously the prism through which they observe what happened. The former have accepted their past, but have not been influenced by it in their present, while the latter do not accept what happened and are still wallowing in it, so they end up losing much more of life.

If you’re reading this, you’re alive

If you identify with those who blame their discomfort on their past, either by the way you were raised, mistreatment, abuse, rape or traumatic accidents, you should bear in mind that you have gotten out of it and you are alive now.

It’s true you had bad luck and it would have been much better if that never happened, but it happened and nothing is in our hands now to be able to fix it. Therefore, your complaints, your tears and your anger, are unproductive. Stop using them!

Note that now, and nothing else but now, you are alive enough to go out, meet people, dance, hold an interesting conversation, care for a pet, write a book… and all the wonderful things that life has in store for you .

Seriously, do not give up, they are there waiting for you, you just have to accept your past, even give it a hug and say: It’s over, I’m saying good-bye to your memory! I’m going to enjoy my friend the present!

woman with open arms dressed in white in the field

Guilt is useless

We strive, with some frequency, in search of the things to blame for what once took place in our lives. We blame ourselves, other people, our parents, culture… but think about it, for what?

Don’t you think that when things are no longer solvable or are not under our control, it’s better to leave them be? This need to find someone to blame just causes you to spend more time mulling over the past and doesn’t allow you the time or desire to take charge of right now.

Enough with blaming someone; that’s not very important or functional. The important thing is to change your mindset, be grateful that you came out of it, that you’re alive and that you’ve become an even stronger person. From now on you decide to take advantage of your present as you deserve and not waste a minute in your past. Do you dare?

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This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.