Family Beliefs: What Can We Learn From Them?

May 9, 2019
Seeing family beliefs as important lessons will ease the process of assuming them. Dare to look into your heart for those beliefs that you’ve turned into radical convictions

We all have our own resources that help us cope with life. Everyone has both strengths and weaknesses, most of which come up due to family beliefs.

So in a certain way, we could say that we’re apprentices of the obstacles we overcome throughout life; and, in order to do that, we need to make use of different tools.

The essence of who we are is formed during our first years of age, while we’re in our nest, surrounded by the people closest to us. Our family’s actions and words teach us about the world and ourselves. Little by little, it’s our family what shapes us into what we become later on.

Our family helps us understand the world. Through this knowledge, we learn about each other, ourselves, and life itself. We may even get a new perspective on life, something completely different from what we believed. Basically, our concept of the world relies both on our perspective and our family’s, like a hybrid of both beliefs.

Family always leaves a mark. Through words and actions, they show us different beliefs, which may be particular to each home. We’re talking about family beliefs, meaning inherited convictions that stay with us.

Some may be very useful while others may be quite detrimental. That being said, it’s essential that we pay attention to the things we should take from our family and what we shouldn’t.

a painting of a mother and a daughter looking into each other's eyes

Family beliefs, double-edged swords

Our family’s legacy is of great importance. They transmit so many beliefs to us when they show us the world. However, some of them may sometimes remain unconscious, leading us to follow them throughout life by inertia.

Now, there are all kinds of beliefs that are transmitted from generation to generation. Among them, there are some that can be very hurtful. We could say they’re double-edged swords. They’re etched inside of us to the point we’re not even aware of them. We follow them naturally, even if they make us uncomfortable.

Some examples of this could be phrases that have been repeated to us many times, and we’ve never even stopped to think about what they really want to express. “All men are the same” or “All women are the same“. Someone who has been told this phrase repeatedly throughout life may unconsciously follow this belief and distrust men and women to a great extent.

Without realizing it, family beliefs can make us very impressionable. Since we’re so used to following what our family says, we lose track of what we really believe in in the first place.

So we proceed to limit ourselves and just stay with what we’ve learned instead of exploring new horizons for ourselves. Now, this doesn’t mean that all beliefs are negative.

Keeping our roots in mind

Inherited beliefs can also be good. We can learn many things through them, which is why it’s important to keep them in mind. Likewise, if we begin to be more aware of the beliefs we tend to take as mandates, we can then address the negative beliefs we’re so used to following.

In addition, family beliefs are related to our roots, as we mostly learn them during childhood from our close relatives. Now, keep in mind that when we speak of family beliefs, we refer to the people with whom you’ve lived with during a large part of your life. Every family is unique, though.

Our roots are the essence of where we come from. Honoring our upbringing allows us to move forward. Whether they’re good or bad, they’ve definitely allowed us to live certain experiences we should be thankful for. It’s all a matter of learning. When we analyze our most intimate experiences, we begin to feel free to choose our own path.

Then, once we grow, we can decide the path we want to pursue. We can also choose which lesson to keep with us and which ones we want to discard. Our roots are important but we decide what to keep and follow consciously. Making a conscious effort to internalize what these lessons want to transmit helps us grow as individuals.

a family shaped tree representing family beliefs

How to learn about your family beliefs

Paying attention to the beliefs we’ve learned can be extremely useful. That way, we can stay with those that benefit us and question those that we assumed without prior analysis. Although they all have a message and we can learn something from all of them, keeping those that are most beneficial to us will allow us to have greater well-being.

Look at the following ideas to search for family beliefs:

Know yourself

The art of knowing ourselves helps us learn about our reactions, thoughts, and feelings. Once you know about them, your own beliefs won’t be a blur anymore. The key is learning who you are.

Reflect

Pondering about the pros and cons of your surroundings will definately help you be more aware of your beliefs.

Make a list

Making a list of beliefs will help you see them more consciously. After making the list, you can think of strategies to improve those that harm you. You can always incorporate new beliefs that you hadn’t taken into account previously.

Pay attention to cliché phrases

This is a very important one. Pay attention to the phrases your family repeats over and over again. There, you’ll find many hidden beliefs.

What are your prejudices?

Beliefs and prejudices go hand-in-hand. It’s essential to be attentive to them. Don’t forget that there are beliefs that enhance the well-being of those who follow them. There’s nothing more wonderful than knowing what’s good for you and keeping it in your life.

Now, detecting beliefs isn’t the only important process here. Once you’ve detected them, it’s important to modify those that you’re not comfortable with. Transform them into something positive, something that makes you feel good. Dare to make the unconscious conscious.

a man with glasses thinking, looking out the window

Benefits of learning from family beliefs

We all can take advantage of learning from the legacy that our family has left us through their beliefs. Here are some of the benefits we can count on:

  • It frees you from unconscious aspects that hurt you.
  • Learning from these enhances your well-being.
  • You can increase harmony.
  • It will Increase knowledge.
  • You will improve the way you relate to others.
  • Even more, it will Allow you to take advantage of the here and now.
  • Similarly, it allows you to find your own truth.
  • And lastly, it pushes you to leave prejudices aside.

Family beliefs take us as far as we allow them to. When they’re beneficial, they can lead you to reach our goals and not give up when things get rough.

However, when they’re toxic, they can lead you to make bad decisions for yourself. It’s up to you to decide what you follow and what you don’t. Don’t let anyone else make this decision for you!

Now, it’s vital to be attentive to them because of their unconscious aspect. If you’re not aware of them, it’ll be impossible for you to transform them into something positive.

You can make a fabulous metamorphosis of your family’s legacy, understanding that it’s allowed you to understand the world in some way. You can take advantage of these lessons or get away from them, depending on the way you feel about them.

Seeing family beliefs as important lessons will ease the process of assuming them. Dare to look into your heart for those beliefs that you’ve turned into radical convictions. Don’t be afraid of turning your inner world into a different (and more conscious) perspective.