My Dreams Have No Age, Only Desires

August 26, 2016

I no longer measure my dreams based on my age. For measuring things based on age, I reached places that were too dry for my sensibility, I hurried through fields in which I could have harvested lessons if I had just taken my time and paused for a while.

I reached deserted stations where there was still no train ready to depart. There’s was nothing there for me. In trying to act according to my age, I plunged into a rough and linear series of events that I didn’t want to complete without having at least experienced them, because I wasn’t prepared for it.

By acting like my age, I let passions go by because I thought them fortuitous, believing that these expanded and contracted according to my future desires. I left conclusions half-understood that would have served me during my entire life. I pulled out of experiences simply due to the guilt I felt for experiencing something “at the wrong time in my life.”

My dreams have no age

I thought lessons came in stages or phases, not in experiences. But now, I have learned that my dreams have no age, just desires. They have the desire to be feed with constancy, gratitude, hope and determination. I no longer pay attention to the score board, because I know where I stand. And I that know I’m the one who throws the dice.

The dice has many sides, but it always lands firm and true, just like my current attitude towards the dream I’m currently chasing. I’m not scared to keep playing at dreaming, because I take it more seriously than an obligation.
smiling girl looking up

My dreams can’t be measured

My dreams have no age, only a desire to be accomplished. Something that can’t be measured on an ID, a resume or a policy scale. They are measured by the desire I feel to tell the rest of the world that I no longer care whether I should carry them out according to the year I was born. They are measured by the emptiness I felt while doing what I was “supposed” to do without really wanting to, and by the anguish of not wanting that to happen again.

I disown the traditions that I dislike, the subtle impositions that I hate deep down inside. I embrace them when I find them pleasant to carry out and not simply when I’m forced to. Because the only thing that matters is my happiness. The happiness of my soul.

My dreams are not up in the air, they levitate for my enjoyment

My dreams aren’t based on unreliable foundations simply because I have dreamed them instead of experienced them in a tangible reality. I have made a mental training of the enjoyment of my dreams even if they’re not present in my life, because I’m a hedonist. I like to enjoy the pleasures of life that imagination can provide me.

My mind is so unkind to me that whenever it shows me a marvelous path, I feed it so that it won’t stop emitting sparks. That’s how I stay full of joy and hope. It’s a survival technique that doesn’t denote ingenuity but rather maturity to stop being bitter about life, even if only for a short moment every day.

“If you have built castles in the air, your work hasn’t been wasted; now just build the foundation under them.”  
-George Bernard Shaw-

My dreams will never be harmful, but they can generate envy

I don’t know why other people’s dreams rub people the wrong way. They want to push you off your cloud, when that is the most marvelous part of it all. I’m set on accomplishing them, but I don’t want to miss out on any of their stages. I’m convinced that in the same way that we should enjoy the innocence of our childhood, we should savor the aroma of the dreams that surround our lives. Without being hurried or coerced.

But be careful with the people that lack longing and hope. They tend to shake and ambush you until they get you to feel the slap of our crude reality. Until they get you to fall so hard that it seems all that is left is screams, bills and days piled up full of misery and routine. I want to enhance them with a little something else. It’s a privilege from my mind that I don’t want anyone to take away from me.

It’s not that I haven’t fought for my dreams, but I refuse to let it become just a fight

I don’t want to turn my dream into my nightmare. Therefore, you have to control the times, those relative to my maturity and to the way the world matures with me. It’s important to achieve them, but it’s not worth doing it with a haggard gaze and hurried steps. That’s not your dream, that’s your ego trying to force you into beating out everyone else, instead of achieving your dream on your own terms.

Not a single day goes by in the life of someone who truly wants to achieve something in which they have don’t doubts about how they can achieve it: uncertainty, disappointment, sadness. But emptiness only arrives when they abandon the fight though they still have some strength to go on.

“When our dreams are accomplished, that’s when we comprehend the richness of our imagination and the poverty of reality.” 
-Ninon de Lenclos-
happy girl among flowers

Society snatches away dreams, I don’t let it take mine

Society doesn’t want people with dreams that are different than the ones it tries to impose, and sometimes it turns to your age as a way to dissuade you and make you give up. But, in reality, the poorest age is the one that lacks self-knowledge. You can feel an immense existential void at 16 years old that you couldn’t even fathom in your life at 63.

So stop listening to those who tell you that you can no longer accomplish something “at your age”. That it belongs to another chapter of your life. Show them that people aren’t stratified into stages, but rather into desires that make us like some more than others. Depending on whether we are ready for them or not. If you do what you wish to do, you’ll leave them without a solid argument to make.

If you give up, you’ll be giving their arguments power so that they’ll continue fulfilling their dream: uprooting the authentic and vivid dreams they see in others. They are victims of reality. Since they never learned how to dream, they also don’t know how to live.