Coincidence or Cause?
For days I needed to write this. I want, if I may, to reflect on my own thoughts and share them with you. My intention is to share these reflections which will serve to stir something within you, dear reader.
If you have come here in search of an answer or, at least, to find an interpretation of it, I’ll let you know in advance that I left an open end for you so that you can come to your own conclusions.
Here’s a question:
Does everything happen by chance? Or does everything happen for a reason? Meaning, does it happen by the movement that we generate ourselves?
“Chance is not and cannot be more than an ignored cause of an unknown effect “
-Voltaire-
My story of coincidence and causality
Before yesterday morning I sat in front of a blank page waiting for my hands and my head to get to work, but there was no luck. I had only a vague idea in my head of what I wanted to convey, and after five minutes I decided to leave it for later.
Perhaps it was because I was tired or not very inspired to write anything, so I went outside to clear my head. I did just that. The truth is that the change of scenery proved helpful.
Hours later, now more determined and eager, I returned and planted myself in front of the paper as a challenge. And nothing. It was impossible.
After ten minutes I was once again feeling defeated, so again I left the desk chair and looked for some entertainment by reading, especially to stop thinking about my inability to write this article.
So I turned to one of my favorite books: “Blue World” by Albert Espinosa. I opened it to a random page that ended with the following quote: “And there I was, watching the blackness, waiting for daylight.”
What a coincidence! The quote described just how empty I was feeling. Was the world sending me signs?
I closed the book and returned back to my workload.
Now more inspired with ideas about how to structure my piece, or so I thought, I held my pen firmly to write the first line. I wrote- Coincidence or cause? – and I felt better about myself. As if I had overcome the barrier of that void with that complex question.
And then my inspiration was finished, or rather, my desire and my patience ran out.
Desperate, after a few minutes of searching for another coincidence to bring me to start on my keyboard again, I got up again, made dinner and went to take a shower, trying to” refresh my ideas.”
But I was too tired and thought I’d better stop trying, so I went to bed. Tomorrow will be another day. A clean slate.
Early in the morning I woke up with a vengeance. I had breakfast and sat in front of what these past few days had become my “enemy”: the blank paper.
With the feeling of being stuck in an infinite loop, I went back into the same process of frustration of the previous day that had me doubting my ability to write this article.
Perhaps it was not a coincidence, but a cause on my part? Wasn’t it I who was postponing what seemed impossible?
The truth is that I could not stand five minutes sitting in the chair. In many cases, inspiration does not come on it’s own. It must be sought.
I could have done drafts, outlines, found information about the subject or directly accepted that I should move on to another topic in the hope of being able to link it with this one. However, I got carried away by hopelessness and frustration which in turn led me to think that I was unable when really only minutes went by and I did nothing to try.
Now I find myself writing these last words, which coincidentally (or by cause?) have led me to the most important question: Was I afraid to write what I thought? or was it not safe to share these thoughts with you?
There are only two things certain in this piece:
The first is that, by chance, I found the following quote when I reopened the book from the other day to a random page: “Unresolved questions are not accepted fears”.
The second is that, by chance, one thought has led me to another. I have been the master of my words and my emotions.
And I returned to turn the page.
“The world is the largest courtyard there is”