If there’s one thing that people always learn sooner or later is that sitting around and waiting for things to happen on their own is pointless. In order to be happy, you have to make decisions. When we are able to promote that magical change within ourselves, only then will it happen. That’s when our surroundings will also be impregnated by the same harmonious movement.
One of the most notable writers in the history of literature was without a doubt Anton Chejov. With his words, critical and skillful in the emotional and psychological world, he reminded us that common people are always waiting around for good and bad things to appear from external sources. On the other hand, wise people expected and awaited everything from themselves.
When you stop waiting, life changes. That is something I have learned with time, because it is not enough to simply wish or desire something. Because a wish thrown into the world on a starry night changes nothing. Instead, a decision changes everything.Share
When waiting seems like the only choice
Many of us have been brought up on that culture of illusion and rewards. We believe that, just like in fairy tales, life always has a happy ending. We were taught that you have to tolerate frustration before receiving positive reinforcement. And we were also told, in hushed tones, that good things always happen to good people.
Nevertheless, as we started gobbling up reality and falling into “bear traps” on our vital trails, many of us reach the conclusion that people have no control at all over this thing called life. We think that maybe it is better to wait, remain still and dig roots into our comfort zones while we set our gaze on the windows of life. We sit and wait for luck to come knocking on our door.
Now, if good things happen to good people… Why do we only experience disappointing things? Are we the exception to the rule? No, life simply doesn’t work that way.Share
Waiting should never be the only option we have to the problems and voids of our existence. It’s time to leave aside what you feel in order to think about what you truly need. Life is not a picnic. We know that. But, in truth, it is also not all bad or hostile. Reality is as easy or as tough as you choose to see it.
When you stop waiting around, life changes
We tend to blame our surroundings and the people in it for our unhappiness. We blame them for clipping the wings of our growth and opportunities. With this scheme of thought, what we are truly doing is fertilizing our mind with the dirt of discomfort in order to plant within the seeds of suffering.
We know that you’ve already heard and read this before: what you think influences your behaviors and emotions. But, nevertheless, we don’t always manage to take the reins of this runaway horse that is fear.
“If I stop blaming my partner for my unhappiness and leave them, I’ll be alone and that is something that makes me very scared.” “I would rather wait for new job offers to arise in my town instead of moving to a different city. Because that step generates a lot of insecurity within me.”
Almost without knowing how exactly, our minds turn into authentic washing machines, where terrifying speeches and anguish go round and round. Here, we limit ourselves to just seeing what doesn’t work instead of taking care of the things that are going well. This isn’t right. We have to make a change in our cognitive patterns. Also, we have to understand that life doesn’t wait for us. It doesn’t stop, and it doesn’t give warnings either. In fact, we’re missing it by just letting life go by.
Strategies to generate a change in our lives
When it comes to happiness and the realization of dreams, there is no magic formula. Each one of us has to be capable of finding the equation that best works for our specific needs, character and circumstances.
Nevertheless, there are some basic, fundamental guidelines that can help us cross that line of fear in order to generate a change and stop waiting around. These guidelines are as follows:
- We shouldn’t be scared of making mistakes, errors, or of failure. Not waiting around in order to be happier implies making decisions, and if one of them isn’t the right one, it won’t be the end of the world. Because, we will discover that our decisions might have been the correct ones.
- He who stops waiting and dares to act, doesn’t do it because they are convinced that everything is going to go well. They do it because it is the right thing to do, because remaining stationary won’t lead us anywhere. Instead, movement in itself is life.
- Regulate your obsession for maintaining control over everything around you, as well as anxiety. This is also a reflection of fear.
- Curb the negative dialogue and the “ruminating” thoughts full of fatalism. They are of no use. Recycle them.
- Don’t anticipate anything that might or might not happen, and limit yourself to simply opening your mind. Because life is not a problem you need to solve. It is a mystery that should be lived and experienced.