Being a Mother Is to Give Your Heart Away
The art of being a mother can’t be taught in school, inherited, or learned from books. You feel it, you’re born with it and it appears like a shell that envelops you and gives you strength. Strength you never thought you had.
Being a parent, grandparent, aunt or uncle also means to suddenly discover how a part of your essence takes shape and conquers your heart. It’s wonderful. Nevertheless, the simple act of giving birth to a small creature establishes a bond that’s stronger, and at the same time more intimate between the mother and child.
Being a mother is to create a love you didn’t think existed. And though it’s clear that any woman can give birth, you know that your experience is unique. You feel much more alive and every day you’re amazed by how something so small can be so great…
Being a mother is a worthwhile adventure
When a woman holds her child in her arms it establishes a certain pact between her and the child. Almost at a whisper, she promises to do everything within her power to make them a happy person, to protect them from all evil and support them every single day of their life in each decision they make.
Your heart has suddenly expanded and with it your ability to love. It’s a different kind of love and so powerful, that it will make you forgive what others wouldn’t. And you won’t mind the sleepless nights, all of those hours taking care of them when they’re sick, when they shout out for you because they’re scared of the dark…
They will be children only once in their lives, but you will always be their mother. And that is a pact that you accept with immense serenity, knowing full well what it applies. The responsibility. Because being a mother or father is an adventure that is always worth the while.
Being a mother: an invisible bond that nurtures, educates and liberates
Some perceive “their moment.” The moment they decide to be a mother because they feel an inner stirring, because their personal situation allows for it. In other cases, it comes at you as an unforeseen event that disturbs you at first. Then it’s accepted and finally, it becomes the best unplanned act of your life.
Being a mother means to be linked to your children by an invisible string that can’t be broken.
If there’s something that many mothers (and parents) fear, it’s to fail. To not do it right. Often times, many of us keep our own parents’ mistakes in mind. The ones we wish to not repeat…
A deep detachment that never allowed us to establish an adequate bond with them. Lack of acknowledgement, insecurity, criticism. Having received an authoritarian educational style, where an adequate dialogue never existed. Just rigidness, distance and coldness. Or, on the other hand, having suffered the consequences of an overprotective education that stymied our personal development, our ability to choose, to have security.
It’s clear that nobody has a perfect manual to be a good mother, a good father, but what we should understand is that it’s not about being a perfect mother. It’s simply about “being a mother,” being there, and for this reason it’s convenient to apply these principles.
You’ll accompany their steps, you’ll offer them your values to educate a happy and free person
If there’s something that every mother wishes for their children it’s happiness. Children need to feel a safe attachment during their first years of age. This is how they’ll feel loved and integrated into their first social sphere, their family.
A child that’s acknowledged, loved and valued within the family feels safe enough to explore the world. As a mother, you’ll offer them the essential values that define you: respect for others and yourself, love, comprehension, empathy, liberty, respect for nature, personal growth, humility…
Being a mother means to, above all, do your best so that tomorrow they may also be free, mature adults, capable of giving happiness to others.
Bonds that don’t judge or subject, bonds that care for you
Some mothers are surprised by the personality of their children, as if they wished, in some way, that they were exact copies of themselves or their fathers. They judge them and even reproach certain things out loud in front of others.
Children aren’t copies of their parents. Children are free creatures with personal and unique traits and needs that adults should understand in order to promote, encourage and guide them on the path of happiness.
Being a mother also means to accept our children just as they are to lead them hand in hand down the best path. Later on, we’ll encourage their independence through responsibility and involvement.
It’s not an easy task, but rather a life project where the bond that you establish with your children will always be the engine that will give you strength and impulse. Because it will all be worthwhile as long as you do it with love.