Love is the Best Medicine for Wounded Hearts

March 29, 2018

Love is the deepest, most intense feeling we can experience in our daily lives. It moves millions of people around the world. It helps heal our wounds after our hearts have been broken.

And we’re not just talking about romantic love between lovers. We’re talking about love in all of its forms: self-love, a mother’s love, love between friends. Feeling acknowledged and accepted by others helps us put our hearts back together. It helps us feel like we’re not alone when we’re going through a rough patch.

“We are born alone, live alone, and die alone. Only through love and friendship can we create the momentary illusion of not being alone.”
-Orson Welles-

Think about love towards yourself. Solid self-esteem helps us recover when we’ve been hurt and our hearts have been injured. And self-love is just what the doctor ordered when things get hard.

What is love, and what is it good for?

When we speak of love, we’re not just talking about romantic love, but about love in general. Love invites us to socialize and interact with people better. Usually, it feels good. It is an extremely powerful feeling that enables us to form close connections with the people we care about.

 “One of the purposes of a human life, regardless of who’s controlling it, is to love whoever is nearby to be loved.”
-Kurt Vonnegut-

Two girlfriends hugging after a long time.

It’s the unique element that underlies empathy and compassion. Love can make us feel so happy you might wonder if it’s a drug. Because once the effect is over, we usually want more; it’s addictive.

Love, according to neuroscience, is a psycho-physiological reaction that takes place within the body via the release of neurotransmitters in the brain. These include oxytocin, vasopressin, and dopamine. These hormones play an important role in feeling pleasure, euphoria, satisfaction, and fullness. Certain areas of the brain are activated, areas that help us bond with people. 

Broken hearts can be healed

We’ve all had our hearts broken at some point. The pain could come from a breakup, or maybe one of those disappointments that happen occasionally between friends. You feel sad, like you have an emptiness inside and your heart has been shattered into a million pieces.

Imagine that your best friend stops calling you because they’ve met someone new and no longer have time for you. How would you feel? No doubt you’d feel betrayed and hurt, wondering what just happened. But despite the pain of heartbreak, we are indeed capable of rebuilding our hearts. We can rise like a phoenix from the ashes.

Two puzzle pieces which together make hearts

 “To love is not only to offer caring. It is, above all, to provide understanding.”
-Françoise Sagan-

In fact, our hearts get stronger through adversity more than almost any other time. This characteristic is called resilience. It’s the ability to adapt positively to difficult circumstances. It doesn’t matter if life hits us with all of its might. We can learn from the pain. It’s simply a matter of seeing our story from a different perspective.

Self-love is the thread that will stitch your wound up

Self-love is the foundation of recovery after any kind of breakup. Accepting ourselves, our weaknesses and strengths both, helps us be more loving and compassionate. To ourselves and to others.

For example, imagine that you accept yourself just as you are. You feel confident about your appearance and your inner self. Do you see how much easier it would be for you to handle a breakup? Granted, it won’t ease the pain much, since that is a natural part of loss. But at least you’ll have the strength to heal your wounded heart once you’ve grieved.

A happy woman is hugging herself.

Saying goodbye to things is hard. The sadness can give us the mistaken impression that our heart will stay broken forever. However, even if we’ll end up with scars, our hearts will eventually heal.

Only brave souls ask for help

Don’t feel inferior if you need someone to lend you a hand; it’s the most normal thing in the world. When you’re processing grief, you’ll probably need the support of trusted people in your life. Talk to them and let them give you their support. Your loved ones can help you put your story back together. This way you can close this chapter and start a new one.

You get even stronger when you don’t carry your pain alone and instead share it with people you trust. Verbalizing your wounds will heal them. You’ll be able to say, “I went through something hard but I made it through.” And remember this if you are having a hard time getting to this point. In some cases, you might need the help of a psychologist in order to get a new perspective on life.

In short, broken hearts can be mended with self-love and your loved ones’ support. Your heart will heal and you’ll put it back together in a way that will end up being much stronger. Accept your pain so that the sadness may turn into new hope.