When Emotions Aren't Expressed, the Heart Hurts

When Emotions Aren't Expressed, the Heart Hurts
Gema Sánchez Cuevas

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Gema Sánchez Cuevas.

Last update: 21 December, 2022

No one is capable of looking within and seeing emptiness, because even a void has a bottom within each and every one of us. We’re all full of people, moments, and tiny details that form us each day as the people we are.

All of these little things made us greater in some moment in our lives, even the absences. Because I know of people who live filled with absences, and even that sounds like being full. What happens is that we’re also full of emotions that hurt us and when they’re not expressed, the heart can’t move forward.

Listen to yourself, get rid of what harms you

If there’s something that differentiates us from the rest of the animals is our ability to talk. The spoken word, besides being our most distinctive tool of expression, is also sometimes the best cure we can have for our inner self. Talking is putting words to what we feel, giving it its own place.

In this sense, one of the things that can most make us feel better is being thankful for the opportunity to express yourself. To be able to express out loud what is hurting you, letting it out and making it leave. Expressing what we feel is a way of freeing ourselves.

drawing- girl and bird

In the same way that we buy a one-way ticket somewhere, expressing our feelings is the exit to everything that doesn’t let the heart be happy.

Putting up a shield won’t make you stronger

When life shuts its door to us, it can make us lose sight of who we are. And the only way to regain control is to listen to yourself. Scream if it’s necessary.

We know that we cry, hurt and even hate ourselves at times. As if it were our fault that we’re blocked. As if there was something bigger than us that made us hold back and kept our hands tied. We can’t really define it, but it’s there.

Because just as the title reads, when pain isn’t expressed, the heart hurts. It hurts because everything is still inside. As if we had pins in our hands and every time we touch ourselves we would cause more harm.

However, we don’t notice that we hold within an inner self that can beat anything. What we forget is that a person’s heart needs to get out every once in a while. It needs for us to open up the windows and listen to it so it can heal and take care of us.

girl hugging knee

The hardest smile to express is the smile of the heart

When we don’t allow the heart to close in and we open up to other people, and ultimately to the world, we experience relief and progressive satisfaction. We will experience such a pleasant sensation that in the future we will try to act in a similar way.

When you start to move forward little by little, you’ll see how a smile will start drawing itself across your face. This smile, and you know this better than anybody, has cost you a lot. But now, it feels better than anything. It has cost you tears, suffering and a lot of personal effort in order to achieve it.

We’ve gotten rid of the dark colors inside us. And when this happens, we once again see the rainbow. Just like when it rains, because it has to rain for us to see the best version of the sky.

In other words, the smile that’s hardest to express is the smile of the heart. Because if it’s not expressed, there’s something inside us that doesn’t let our true essence shine through. When you do express it, you discover that you should love yourself, and that the world is there to be enjoyed, without any boundaries or storms.


This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.